Balbanes' Comments

Game Comments
Play Robot Wants Fishy Robot Wants Fishy Mar. 04, 2015
Maybe the latest game will be "R♂b♂t Wants R♀b♀t" (damn symbols didn't line up the way I wanted) where Robot seeks a female Robot for a girlfriend.
Play Robot Wants Fishy Robot Wants Fishy Mar. 04, 2015
When I finished the game and took in all I had to do to be able to get to and open the gold door and the fact that the fish is even locked up in the first place, I wondered: "Is this Spooky Fish that Stan owned in that episode of South Park that killed a bunch of people when a Native American burial ground was violated?" Just what did the fish do or what hang-up did whoever imprisoned the fish have against it that they had to lock it behind a gold door way up on a high cliff requiring numerous amazing and deadly abilities and upgrades to get to it and beat many strong, dangerous and half impenetrable creations both living and machine made to guard progression toward releasing one fish in a bowl and terminate without question or prejudice any and all who would attempt to try doing so? Like the singer of Led Zepplin said in Stairway to Heaven: "Ooooooohhhhh, really makes me wonder..." XD
Play Gorgeous Girl - Strip Game Gorgeous Girl - Strip Game Mar. 03, 2015
Anyone should immediately know that this wouldn't be exposing or real because a public game site like Kongregate, Armor Games, etc. wouldn't have those kind of X rated games. But it was kind of funny to check it out and see what the joke would be. XD
Play A Duck Has An Adventure A Duck Has An Adventure Mar. 01, 2015
I have no idea why, but these kind of frame-by-frame stories with these games are kind of entertaining. :D
Play A Duck Has An Adventure A Duck Has An Adventure Mar. 01, 2015
I LOVE how we don't have to start the map all over when we finish a life path. :D I mean we could map it out ourselves on a sheet of paper or word document, but ya know...
Play Dude and Zombies Dude and Zombies Feb. 27, 2015
Had to restart my browser three times because of lag before I finished; anyone else have the lag problem? Looks like M00nshad3 in the top 5 comments did too.
Play Idle Farmer Idle Farmer Feb. 24, 2015
For the Wife's watering skill: yes I agree, it does do pretty much nothing in the beginning. Even as you level it up 5 or 10 levels it still does almost nothing. The way it seems to work is that you'll notice on the right of the number for Wife's watering is a " symbol. This is to represent seconds, specifically, how many seconds the plants stay watered shown by how full the blue "watered" bar is. I've timed their depletion and it looks to be 50 seconds until the bar runs empty. So, a full water bar has 50 seconds of the field being watered (x2 growth speed) and the number for the Wife's watering skill is how many seconds she fills up the bar for. For example, if you level her up to where the number is 5.00" then she fills all bars one tenth full because the water bar is 50 seconds and 5 seconds is one tenth of that. So, if you wanted her to fill the bars half way, you have to get her watering skill number to 25.00” and that takes a lot of levels for her. This is what I can make of it.
Play Give Up, Robot Give Up, Robot Feb. 22, 2015
1/5 stars just for the ridiculousness of level 50. Can't stop moving when I stop actually moving. Not a game glitch, but how it was programmed; sudden speed bursts are not necessary. And the swaying gets really irritating really fast. Either slow down how fast you have to move and react or make the structure blocks that make up everything one color and not blinking; it makes your vision hazy after a while. And that was just Normal mode; just what the hell kind of bullsh*t nightmare is Hard mode?
Play Red Red Feb. 18, 2015
Here's a good way to get 600: Volleyball, particularly the planetoids (the meteors that take up almost half the screen and appear by itself); many people may do it already. Even if you “shave” like Xentos said, it's still pretty hard to keep surviving for 10 whole minutes. They appear in groups at a time, so as long as even just one meteor is onscreen, no others will ever appear until that last one is out. So, volleyball the biggest meteor, since it has a huge area and goes by far the least distance when hit. Keep hitting the bottom just enough to keep it "floating", like in Volleyball when bumping the ball into the air over and over. You'll have to hit it slightly on one side when it drifts a bit. DO NOT get turrets, random constant shots screw up "floating" shooting. Eventually, the meteor will get too low and you won't replenish ammo quite fast enough, in which you'll have to get rid of it and suck it up the rest of the way. Even with this and Xentos' method, it's still really hard.
Play Red Red Feb. 18, 2015
@mattman2005 said it is too boring to go for the Hard badge. I kind of agree; while I wouldn't exactly define it as boring, 600 seconds, that's 10 whole minutes is quite a while to be doing that same shooting thing, especially with more targets appearing AND the wind getting stronger. I think the game can be hard enough with more appearing over time, the wind doesn't have to get stronger, it will already be hard enough to get good shots with more and more clustering. Also, I think -100 seconds to make the requirement 500 seconds is fine for a Hard badge.
Play DayMare Town DayMare Town Feb. 17, 2015
{DanMasterson90's comment: "DayMare Town, Y U NO HAVE BADGES?"} Probably because this potentially good game is wwwwwaaaaaaaayyyyyyy too much of a background-item blended pixel hunt to be properly enjoyed.
Play DayMare Town DayMare Town Feb. 17, 2015
I also agree with @saniec about the pixel hunt aspect. Like Submachine, it seems like it would be fun until you get to the puzzles that don't make sense, like where you turn four knobs clockwise. I just turned #1 (as I named them) once, twice, thrice then back to point up, then #2 once then turned #1 the same as before. Rinse and repeat for all knobs until I eventually did all possible combos and "solved" it. What I hate most is how the cursor has to be in tight spots to to find areas to look when the whole thing is colored almost the same and it's all lines making everything look like everything else and so hard to discern things from the background, like the hook by the well, which looks like just another scribble drawn around. The only thing I have against Submachine is that in later ones (6 or 7 on up) the "secrets" become invisible, and then you literally DO have to run the cursor at EVERY pixel and hope you find them all; really loses it's appeal in a game that is otherwise good.
Play Dream Tower Dream Tower Feb. 17, 2015
Great game; only flaw is that there's not much incentive to keep collecting gems and stuff if the score resets upon quitting to the menu.
Play Dream Tower Dream Tower Feb. 17, 2015
Some other comments made me think, your character is like a cross between Kirby and Pikachu.
Play Fade Fade Feb. 16, 2015
At a certain speed, accelerating fast enough, with the double jump and wall climb abilities, the scenery goes by so fast that it's almost impossible to see it coming in time for the Human, non-Jedi reflexes to react and it becomes no longer about skill, but just incessantly jumping while hoping you have a patch you can jump off of and not hit too far down a cliff side, which is long after you've met any speed or distance requirements. XD Don't get me wrong, after you've acquired everything in this type of game, it is kind of fun to just keep jumping and going further to see how long your luck lasts.
Play Swords & Potions 2 Swords & Potions 2 Feb. 15, 2015
{Customer enters} "I'm looking for a Plain Sword", {suggest} Club. "That's exactly what I had in mind!" ...... -.- 'Then why did you say Plain Sword- never mind, I won't look a gift sale in the mouth' {cough} "Very good sir, enjoy your new weapon". :D *fake salesman smile*
Play Inquisitive Dave Inquisitive Dave Feb. 11, 2015
The ending of this game reminded me of the ending scene of The Matrix, where Neo is telling The Matrix through the pay phone inside The Matrix things like "I'm going to show these people a world without you; a world without rules or controls, without borders or boundaries, a world where anything is possible". Both seem like instances where people become free of their fake reality of control that, until recently, they weren't even aware they were in, perceiving only that as "reality".
Play Don't Escape 2 Don't Escape 2 Feb. 10, 2015
If the ground is hard enough that you need a shovel, and you only ever find one shovel, how do two other people make digging a hole faster?
Play Blackbeard's Assault Blackbeard's Assault Feb. 10, 2015
Wow, Kongregate didn't even bother giving the game any tags. XD
Play Endless Migration Endless Migration Feb. 09, 2015
"Plus" this comment if you also think the Medium badge was a bit too hard to be a Medium badge. The hardest part is surviving for 180 whole seconds while there are many instances where many huge and fast aircraft appear at once or right after another from all sides covering what will be the whole area to move in making it literally impossible to avoid getting hit and lose all other geese, half of these times being dealt a fatal hit.