Commanderson

You know something maniacs, first things first. I want the Doctor Proper to know, the Doctor Unger to know, Doctor Hughes to know that the release forms have been signed. You’re not responsible for the last couple fractures in the forearm, brother.

The main priority in the Yapapi Indian strap match, is to have flexibility of the wrist that you strap to your opponent with, brother, because in the Yapapi Indian strap match, when your in the four corners of the battlezone, the main priority is… is to get the body in the proper position for the strapation, dudes.

When I get you right where I want you, when I get you out of wind, sucking air, sweating from head to toe, I will call out to the Indian strapmaster, at ringside, and I will say to him, at ringside. ‘Gimme Yapapi Indian punishment strap number one.’

And as I strap your body, as you scream to the heavens for mercy, as I see your skin start to bubble off your body, you will drop to your knees, and you will say ‘Please Mr. Commanderson, please, I can’t take it anymore. Please, I’m sorry I crossed the line.’

And as I hear you beg for mercy, that’s when I will call to the strapmaster, at ringside for Yapapi Indian Punishment strappage number two. That’s when the heavier bats will come out. That’s when I will strap your skin and the flesh will bubble. That’s when the flesh will start to peel from your hide.

And as I see the raw pink meat on your back brother, I will take it to another level. I will transform. I will double strap you with both fists, and you will scream to the heavens: ‘Please Commanderson, don’t hurt me anymore.’ And I will never stop.