Patric20878's profile

My picture
-Credits to MIO (Cryptosporidian) for professional photograph*

Win:
Fish
Fishies
Fishlings
Fish Food
Turnips
Splashing ducks for 0 damage
Fish’s Signature Move

Lose:
Ducks
Duckies
Ducklings
Duck Food
Corn
Quacking at fish for 0 damage
Duck’s Signature Move

Quotes:
“Fool, my Magikarp is immune to other Magikarp’s splash attacks.” -Blue

“All men are equal before fish.” -Herbert Hoover

“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” -Chinese Proverb

“Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. It’s their way of falling.”
-Andre Gide

“Well, it seems all the fish in the rivers are dying. Could this be an act of cod?”
-Colin Mochrie

Lore
Genesis
In the beginning, there was only Fish. Fish first created the heavens and earth. The earth was void; barren and empty. And so Fish said, “Let there be light!” And there was light. Fish saw the light, that it was fishy, and Fish was pleased. And the evening and morning was the first day.

And Fish said, “…Eh, I has too lazy to create the world in 7 days kthx. Let the world be created instantly!” And so Fish created the skies, heavens, fishlings, ducklings, dry land, plants, animals, humans, coke, sprite, Mardek 3, Kongregate, back pains, power-hungry moderators, trolls, and Cryptosporidian instantly. And Fish saw Its creations, that it was Good, and Fish was pleased. Speaking of pleased, soup is tasty.

The Fall of Duck
When Fish first created the heavenly beings, It created them all in Its image, as fishlings, save one, the ArchDuck, Duck. Duck was a powerful being, created almost equal to Fish Itself. And Duck was Fish’s greatest asset, winning countless battles against locusts, ant armies, evil mooing cows, empty water bottles, coke cans with no coke in them, Greg, Cryptosporidian’s pet moose, and countless more. But Duck was not perfect. One day, Duck thought, “I am tired of being the servant of Fish. I am so powerful, with my Quackattack. Why not take over Aquarium for myself? Quackquackquackquackquackquackquack!!!!!” So Duck rally blitz’d several fishlings that agreed, and together, they declared unpeace on Fish and Its fishlings. This would later be known to petty humans as the Holy FishDuck War of Doom. Eventually, all the fishlings on both sides killed each other, leaving only Fish and Duck left. And in this historical holy battle, Fish and Duck went into RPG mode so they could take turns attacking each other. Because there’s nothing fair like one side getting to attack first, and did I mention, soup is tasty?

The Holy Battle of FishDuck:
Fish: Why have you done this, Duck?
Duck: Quackquackquackquackquack! So funny. Did you really think I like being your petty servant for all eternity?
Fish: I see…with my little fish eyes. Something yellow.
Duck: Indeed, you see something yellow, and that would be me.
Fish: Then let’s end this once and for all.

Battle Start!
Fish has 9999 HP!
Duck has 9999 HP!

Duck: “Quackquackquack! You will never win! Because I poisoned you first and now you are weak!”
Fish: “Noo! You shall never take over the paradise which is Aquarium!”
Duck goes first because the narrator says so! Duck uses wing smash! Fish takes 2000 damage!
Fish uses Aqua Shield! All damage is cut by 1/2! Duck: “Hah, your petty water shield won’t stop me!”
Duck uses Cornattack! Super effective! Fish takes 5000 damage! 2999 HP remaining! Aqua shield dispelled!
Fish: “Noo! Duck you, poisonous traitor!” Fish uses bubblestream! Duck takes 2 damage!
Duck: “Hah, weakling! Now to finish you off!” Duck uses ultimate attack, Quack!
Fish takes 9999 damage! Fish has fainted! Duck: “QUACKQUACKQUACKQUACKQUACK! I HAZ WON!!! AQUARIUM IS MINE!!!!”
…
And the entire world felt it as a looming evil force started taking over the earth.
…
Fish: SPLASH “I AM NOT UNFISH YET! I ate logic before you killed me, therefore, you killed me, but I am not dead! Prepare to be Fished!”
Duck: “…Nooo! That’s cheating! You ducking hacker!”
Fish charges up secret attack*
Duck: “…NOOOOOO, NOT THAT ATTACK! AHHHHHH!!! YOU SHALL NOT WIN!!”
Secret Attack 80% charged*
Duck: “Never! Have at thee!” Duck desperately uses Quack! Fish takes 9999 damage! Duck has killed Fish! Fish did not die!
Duck uses quack again! 9999 damage inflicted! Fish HEALS 9999 hitpoints!
Fish: “You may be a powerful being, but you will never take over what is good and twist it for your evil purposes. Goodbye, my dear creation.”
Fish uses Splash! Super effective! Critical Strike! Statuses Poison, Numb, Paralysis, Sleep, NullAttack, NullMagicAttack, NullDuckAttack, Confusion, AllStatsDropBy9999, MPDrained, DefenseNullification, MagicDefenseNullification, Slow, Stop, Blind, Silence, Death inflicted! 9,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999 damage inflicted! Duck has fainted! Fish is obviously too strong! Better nerf Irelia!

Fish: “I will miss you, Duck. You were my greatest.”

And with that, Fish bans Duck into the deepest and bottomless, most void and lifeless chasm. That place is known as Duckland, where Duck is forever to be doomed in the deepest circle of it in the frozen lake, Ducklake. And even to this day, Duck swears to one day take over the world and reign it with terror for his own, and Duck eventually does in the 1000 years Reign of Terror. But that has not happened yet. That is the prophecy that will come true an unknown time from now. Only in the very end, where Fish ends the world and saves all Its believers in the Final Fishocalypse, will Duck’s rule finally be broken, and Duck be put out of existence once and for all in the final holy war, where the whole of Aquarium will wage war on Duckland, and extinguish the darkness forever from existence.

So, repent! The end may be near! Only those who believe in Fish shall be saved from eternal anguish and be led into Paradise! Repent!!! Or you shall be force fed corn forever!!!

Past Status: PastFish
Current Status: CurrentFish
Future Status: FutureFish