darthgorbag's Comments

Game Comments
Play Guild Dungeons 2 Guild Dungeons 2 Nov. 09, 2014
There is too little instruction here. And while I was trying to read the basic instructions at the start of the game, I was interrupted by several random events. A couple game-weeks passed before I even understood how to hire my first troops. And I can't build ANYTHING at first because we start off with 0 resources other than money. Couldn't even make a basic hovel because it costs lumber. And another half-dozen random events passed by while I was figuring this out. But really, no matter how well the rest of it works, I have to pass on this game because it pauses when these random events happen. When I play IDLE games, I don't sit at my computer with the game open, interacting with every moment. I let it run in my browser while I focus on other tasks, and I come back every now & then to check the game & click a few things. That's impossible with this game because it pauses itself if you don't interact with it every 10 seconds.
Play Glean Glean Sep. 29, 2014
I've dug around so many planets but I can't for the life of me find any amaranthine gas.
Play Caribbean Admiral Caribbean Admiral Jun. 25, 2014
Simple way to build yourself up early on (it's obvious, I know, but I'm commenting in case anyone can use the info). 1. Buy max corn. 2. Take Cancun. 3. Sell corn, buy max bananas, go back to San Pedro. 4. Sell bananas, buy max corn, go back to Cancun. Keep repeating steps 3 & 4. While you're doing it, more level 1 pirates will sail close enough for you to attack them. Destroy each one you can You'll earn some achievements for both the business & the fighting; spent the upgrade points on combat stats (I suggest damage & hull). And buy all 3 upgrades for your ship as soon as possible. Should only take a couple minutes until you can either buy the next combat ship (Cog), then go take Pinar.
Play IndestructoTank! AE IndestructoTank! AE May. 28, 2014
GAAAH I'm almost out of fuel so I need to land on the ground to get my level up but I can't because there are too many planes & missiles keeping me in the air! I literally lost *because* I getting too high a score. There needs to be a better way to dive down the ground in emergency need & not get bounced as high back up by every thing I hit on my way down. A manual combo-breaker.
Play Tactical Assassin 2 Tactical Assassin 2 May. 26, 2014
@AXZN's comment is incorrect. On Mission 2 I had to shoot the guy on the LEFT.
Play Coinbox Hero Coinbox Hero May. 05, 2014
This is by far jmtb02's most pointless game I've played yet. FIVE STARS! :D :D :D
Play The Visitor: Massacre at Camp Happy The Visitor: Massacre at Camp Happy Apr. 30, 2014
Walk a few inches. Get mauled by a giant stork. Walk a few more inches. Get mauled by a giant pig. Walk a few more inches. Get mauled by a small turtle. Start again. Repeat. Those campers were never in nearly as much danger as the alien worm trying desperately to survive long enough to eat them.
Play Lab of the Dead Lab of the Dead Apr. 26, 2014
There needs to be a link here to some sort of "cheat sheet" telling how to get all reactions for each item. From what I can tell, each has a special requirement either for the zombie's Humanity/Mood/Hunger levels, or for doing using a certain combination of other items first. The game says to read the description of the item to see how to do it, but they don't *really* tell. So we have to resort to using random items over & over in random order for endless hours until we magically hit the "secret code" of combinations to unlock an item's special reaction. Does the game's developer SERIOUSLY expect us all to do that?!
Play Relive Your Life Relive Your Life Apr. 19, 2014
There's a bomb on the place! I need to defuse it! What do I do? Answer: I kneel in front of it w/ a pair of wire-cutters, sweating.... forever. Seriously the game has just frozen here. It's not completely frozen, because the animation is still going (sweat continually dripping from his face), but nothing happens when I press any keys, & there no words left onscreen telling me to do anything. I guess I found... the NON ending :/
Play Dungeon Defender Dungeon Defender Apr. 09, 2014
I'm gonna need a strategy guide to get through V on medium difficulty... anyone got one?
Play Frantic Frigates Frantic Frigates Apr. 06, 2014
How on earth do you get "Free Gold from Lachhh the Pirate"?? I recall someone commenting once that you pause the game & wait for him to appear, but I tried using like 5 different methods to "pause" & waited several minutes on each, but no Lachhh.
Play BioLabs: Outbreak! BioLabs: Outbreak! Apr. 05, 2014
The key to winning at this game is *patience.* Unlike Filler, it's not just about trapping the viruses. If you're low on antidote & there are still some virus cells bouncing around, just wait for a minute. If they rub up closely against blots of antidote for long enough, they'll die of exhaustion/exposure. You can often win levels by waiting them out.
Play Dungeon Defender Dungeon Defender Apr. 01, 2014
This game has great potiential, even though (as the top comments have pointed out) it has several flaws. But I love the music, it's so relaxing! I'm upping my rating from 3 to 4 stars just for the music. This is a good kind of game to relax to. Especially since it has a speed slider-bar so you can adjust the pace however you like. Also I believe I've played a free demo of a more advanced version of this game once, from Steam. It had Diablo II-quality graphics, and IIRC even the same name, so must be part of a series. I wish there was a sequel here on Kongregate too.
Play Feudalism II Feudalism II Mar. 25, 2014
...and according to the unbreakable laws of the universe, I earn the badge 1 minute after posting about how I couldn't earn it. :/
Play Feudalism II Feudalism II Mar. 25, 2014
Been playing for 6 hours, done tons of quests, gotten tons of level-ups, captured a couple towns.... still no easy badge. My highest damage received so far: 99. GGRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!
Play SCGMD4 SCGMD4 Mar. 11, 2014
I cannot get one note. The only ones I can get are the ones where I have to hold down the button. Other than that, I literally cannot get one single note right. I know I'm pressing the right buttons. I press them when the corrosponding arrow passes over the black bar in the middle of the green bar at the left. Just like in the instructions. Why isn't it working? Do I have to only press it when only when the tip of the arrow (which is on a different side for each color arrow) touches one particular edge of the black bar? Does it not count if the arrow isn't at the exact one invisible pixel it needs to be one? Or if I tap the keys to slowly, holding them down for 1/16th of a second longer than I'm supposed to? I've played guitar hero on Wii a few times, and though this game has the same concept, it has zero percent functionality. This will be one of the few "easy" badges on Kongregate that I can never ever get :( ---- tl;dr The game is broken so it sucks I can't play it!
Play The Next Floor The Next Floor Mar. 01, 2014
Whoever made beating the game give just a "Medium" badge & made it be a badge of the day, is a psychopath.
Play Berzerk Ball 2 Berzerk Ball 2 Feb. 11, 2014
I think at least 2 of the badges are broken. I'm already at team level 13, got lots of upgrades, have lots of upgrades, have launched dozens & dozens of times, but the "Geek Speed" & "Nuclear Apocalypse" badges still list my progress as 0. I just did a launch, watched my speed meter closely, saw it hit 230+ for a few moments, but still no "Geek Speed" badge credit.
Play Wake Up the Box 2 Wake Up the Box 2 Jan. 03, 2014
Mortn1711 is right! It worked!
Play Idle Mine Idle Mine Dec. 17, 2013
There should be some sort of upgrade to make the blacksmith more likely to NOT "craft a dud." At least 80% of the gems I've spent have gone to waste due to the low success rate of the smith (even after many many upgrades), and even when I'm at the point of earning trillions of dollars an hour, gems are still EXTREMELY rare.