Everybody is too hard on you when you have a bad game. It can take 3 good games to recoup the lost points from your fans etc. and thats just breaking even.
To gain honor you defeat a person of higher level. Although i just lost 90 by defeating a level 12 while I'm level 9. Experience Gained: 169 Honor Gained: -90
My army was 200 larger, but thats no reason to lose Honor when he is 3 levels stronger.