Alfeeze

Hydrogen bombs, man.
Timezones suck arse.
Never trust an atom. They make up everything.
Also, never test text things on your profile.
They can ruin your life.
MY NAME IS NOT ALFREEZE.

Now, time for some BAD CHEMISTRY PUNS!~
(Why bad, you ask? Because all the good ones Argon.)

-I’d start off with a Sodium joke but Na.

-Maybe with a noble-gas joke?…
But then I probably wouldn’t get a reaction.

-OK, HERE’S A FUN STORY:
Some guy stole all of my gold once..
I said, to the thief, as he was running: “Au! Give it back!!!”

-Why did the white bear dissolve in water?
BECAUSE IT WAS POLAR.

-One chemist, said to the other:
“Do you have any Sodium Bromate?”
Second one replied, majestically:
“NaBrO!”

-I lost an electron. In fact, I’m positive.

-What do you call an ion with paw-sitive charge?
A CATION!~

-Speaking of electrons, you might lose one to mr. Fluorine-man.
That’s why you should keep an ion them.

-I’m afraid I’m out of chemistry
Plutionium, Nitrogen, Sulfur
for today, sorry!

Alternate account of the majestic NOONEBOONE.