Cantankerous1_

Me

A homosapien male with a darker pigment in his lower epidermis stole my non motorized transportation unit.
Or in English: A colored man stole my bike.
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First, God does not exist. But don’t worry, what does exist is good as opposed to evil.So if you believe in God, you believe in good, and that’s as it should be. You are just fine. If you believe in evil, then you probably need a whack to the back of the neck with a big fucking stick.
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HOW TO COOK A TURKEY:
First, buy the turkey and a bottle of whiskey. Pour yourself a glass of whiskey and put the turkey in the oven. Take another 2 drinks of whiskey, and set the degree at 375 ovens. Have 3 more whiskeys of drink and turn the oven on. Take 4 whisks of drinky and turk the bastey. Stick a turkey in the thermometer, and glass yourself a pour of whiskey. Bake the whiskey for 4 hours, take the oven out of the turkey, and floor the turkey up off the pick. Pour yourself another glass of turkey. Now just tet the sable, and turk the carvey! =)
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BEING IGNORED?
Being ignored? DO NOT FRET, ladies and gentlemen. There is a quick fix! Just unstrap those belts and unzip those pants, let them flop to the floor and don’t forget those underwear! Stand close to the persons face and make sure they listen to you and answer you. ‘Cause, let’s face it people, it’s hard to ignore someone when they’re holding their genitals a few inches from their face. Specially their ear, talk about easy access, am I right? So if you choose to ignore someone, keep your hair over that ear! It’s not exactly going to stop anything, but it’ll delay it.
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CandyCastle: My friend said his dad had a dream he missed his own funeral. o_O
Cantankerous_: I read Urinal.
Cantankerous_: Don’t know why.
CandyCastle: Imagination to the max.
Cantankerous_: “So today… I had a dream!” “About what, dad!?” “That I missed my own Urinal” – Walks away -
CandyCastle: Rofl
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I am asked so many questions…
But my own questions will never be answered.
I always have to find the answers myself…
Maybe that’s why so many people are befriending me…

In fact, I am such a stubborn person, making mistakes all the time.
But isn’t it alright to make mistakes on a path no one has ever walked before?

I’m not a dreamer, I’m making the things I want come true.
Most people can’t see the sacrifices and pain that it takes to be so passionated…

But somehow I became very calm with it because I have wonderful friends who are like a family to me.

And I thank you all for being there beside me, as I go through my schooling, and work on my art and my skills to become who I want to be…
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You Clever Devil

A teacher asks: I shoot five birds, 2 are dead. How many are left?

Student: None, the others flew away from the sound of the shot.

Teacher: No! It’s a math question, but I like your style.

Student: So, I have a question for you teacher: 3 Women are eating ice-cream, one of them is licking it, one is sucking it, and one is biting it. Which one is married?

Teacher gets embarrassed and answers: Sucking it?

Student: No! The one with the ring on her finger, but I like your style.
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Make sure you want this before you ask
The missus came home steaming drunk last night.
“You up for some role play action, babe?” she asked with a wink. “Not really,” I replied. “Oh, come on,” she said. “We can act out ANY scene, from ANY film you want.” Walking over to her with a huge smile on my face, I noticed her expression change. She had realized her mistake, however it was too late. Where I had previously seen arousal in her eyes, I now saw only blind terror… As I shouted, “THIS… IS… SPARTA!” and kicked her down the stairs.

I realized that I was holding onto something that didn’t exist anymore. That the person I missed didn’t exist anymore. People change. The things we like and dislike change. And we can wish they wouldn’t all day long, but that never works.
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SynysterDeath9: I’m better now. : (reply)
SynysterDeath9: .. :# (reply)
SynysterDeath9: ****EFINGURbzijtnx. (reply)
SynysterDeath9: THIS IS SHIT. (reply)
SynysterDeath9: :# (reply)
SynysterDeath9: ==-.- (reply)
SynysterDeath9: ;3? (reply)
SynysterDeath9: OH GODDAMMIT (reply)
SynysterDeath9: :3 (reply)
SynysterDeath9: VICTORY (reply)
To SynysterDeath9: LOL
SynysterDeath9: If I failed again someone would have got shot. (reply)