Sit-rep from Major Bacon, 21st Armored Swine Corp,
Reports from front-line scouts indicate, that in addition to the hazardous terrain, partially thanks due to our allies careless placement of traps, our mortal enemies, the Wolves and Bears have joined forces, back with vehicles, as well as signing a ceasefire with the local Griffons clans. There have also been talk unknown creatures kidnapping our scouts, but I have yet to verify this.
I plan on break through with the Winged Warhog company that recently arrived.
I'm a tough guy who likes to clean dinosaurs... That DOES sound tough
I'm also a red porn star who likes to corrupt bookshelves... Sliding my latest pictures in between the pages.
In addition, I'm a crazy viking prince who like to bake zebra... hey, you'd have to be crazy to go through all the effort of sailing to Africa and catching one just to bake it.
I initially felt sorry for killing the soldiers and smashing their defenses, then I remembered that A) they are trying to kill me, B) they are wasting precious resources like choppers on me, C) they are trying to carpet bomb me, as opposed to the hordes of zombies, D) they nuked the city...
Oh S***, I'm a commie! And roughly between Stalin and Gandhi at that. And literally on the line separating Totalitarianism and Anarchism. Strange... I thought I would be a fascist Totalitarian...
Man... the those bandits at the bunker are insane, after firing two rpgs, 5 pointblank shotgun rounds, a dozen grenades, and several bullets, only three died... seriously, how the heck can they take a direct hit from a rpg and two grenades and still live to tell the tale...
... it mentioned that each human has a unique tongue print twice, that it is a button three times, three times it mention no badges and the third time is misspelled, six times it told someone to die in a fire, that this game doesn't have an ending three times, and that it has an ending four times. Let me know if I forgot any.
 "300 miles to Pigsland"){kind=icon}
 "Renegade's Sleeping Beauty"){kind=icon}
 "You are a... The Sequel"){kind=icon}
 "You are a..."){kind=icon}
 "Road of the Dead"){kind=icon}
 "WarLight"){kind=icon}
 "RPG Shooter: Starwish"){kind=icon}
 "Political Compass"){kind=icon}
 "Crystal Story"){kind=icon}
 "The Sagittarian 3"){kind=icon}
 "Caravaneer"){kind=icon}
 "Another Pointless Flash Button Game Derived From Other Pointless Flash Button Games Inspired For No Absolute Reason Featuring a Random Button That Asks You Random Pointless Objects and Challenges You (Yes you.) To Complete This Super Long Game If You Can"){kind=icon}
 "PlanetDefender"){kind=icon}