OTACON120

My life started in the year 1507 A.D. as an ignorant little ogre whose daily life consisted of eating leftover toenail clippings from passing merchant caravans, and worshiping a giant golden sheep in the sky. Yes, life was great when I was -379 years old. In fact, life was pretty freakin’ sweet.

That is, until the slightly-annoying witch of South Central showed up at my place of employment, local pub/nightclub and social hotspot The Floozy’s Nipple.

…I forget the rest of the story, but I do remember that it ended in your mother being a whore. So there. Your mother’s a whore. Deal with it.