"Ummm yes, on my pizza I would like exactly 4 pieces of green peppers distributed equally on the left half of my pizza. I would also like exactly 2 mushrooms in the upper right quadrant of my pizza. I would like it baked for precisely 39 seconds, but I want it to be done at that point. Anything less than this is not satisfactory for me."
I love the retro feel and I like the dialog. It was interesting enough to make me read and consider it. Thanks for sharing this game with us, ChainedLupine!
I'm not sure what to think of the faces that come at you. I think I am now questioning my sexuality, the meaning of life, and how my Nutella seemingly evaporated.
I didn't use any of the upgrades (e.g. damage) until I lost to the Flying Dutchman repeatedly and then searched for strategies. Perhaps consider making something flash when upgrades are available. Looking at the comments, I'm not the only one that missed this. Anyhow, this is a sweet game overall though. I gave it all 5 stars.