I'm posting an answer in the comments! Only 'cause you told me not to... ok, for number one, DO A BARREL ROLL!!! No, you get no cheats noob, find the answers for yourself.
This game is just awesome. If you wouln't mind, please make more like this. If you will, having 2, or three alternate endings would be nice. But you have a real talent for making games, and I'd love to see more by you.
Hm... bbeing the jerk I was while playing this, I don't think this guy could get a wife... leave your comrads to their fate, ignor a dying co-worker... yeah.