talijasper13

I was born in a ditch somewhere in Ohio. My father died in childbirth (don’t ask me how) and my mother was immediately eaten by a rattlesnake. I was adopted by passing gypsies and lived with them until i was forced to leave them when they were all slaughtered by a rampaging mule. I took up a living in the streets selling…… watches, yeah. i sold watches. I made major dough and got a mansion in Vegas. Now i have 7 wives (who incidentaly have a bunch of sacks with cats in ’em) and 400 babies (i drink powerthirst, it works i tell ya!)

hah! i tricked you ^. thats not really my life