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The Battle for New Haven, An Amorphous+ Story page 3

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avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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(If you can’t tell, I’m making this up as I go along)

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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I would think the queen would remain in the nest. She produces the gloopes.

Also, how do they get over seas? You said they started in America. The rest of the globe would remain uninfected.

Don’t try saying they can breath underwater or they don’t breath.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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They got over seas on ships. Queens are intelligent enough to use boats. Plus, Humans most likely transported some Glooples (Including Queens) over seas, hoping they to be used as weapons. Unfortunately, it became quickly apparent they could not be controlled, thus resulting in multiple queens of multiple contents.

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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Not Britian, we would have shut down our borders (like Madcasgar), plus put up a blockade around us, searching any ships which wanted to pass. Certianly we would have a problem off food though.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Yes, but once the Gloople numbers swelled, they could have easily launched a large attack on any remaining countries.

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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Gloopes don’t attack people, they are peaceful.

 
avatar for Everlovely Everlovely 344 posts
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well no matter what we know they aren’t getting into madagascar. ;)

But in all seriousness I think that some readers have brought up some good points and it sounds like maybe TGG you’ll have to flesh out the background a little bit more. although you tried to set the story in a time further along in the glooples “invasion” it wasn’t abundantly clear how much it had affected technology and civilization. I’m sure a rewrite will be in the future but all stories have to start somewhere. I still think this is a good start and I hope you dont get too discouraged with the constructive criticism.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Perhaps for the when I release the second part I’ll revise the background from the first one.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Also, thanks for all the criticism. If I want this, and any other of my stories, to be any good, this is exactly what I need. Thanks :)

 
avatar for 1shawn1 1shawn1 2527 posts
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Is part 2 done yet?

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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Nope, tomorrow.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Yep, lazy and such.

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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What have you being doing all this time?

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Nothing. At all.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Part 2:
http://diggmark1.blogspot.com/2008/08/battle-for-new-haven-amorphous-story_11.html

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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Yeh, at last!

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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The spike is strong enough to pierce steal. When their spike is retracted, they are nearly impossible to kill. When they soften their membrane to use their spike is the only opportunity to attack.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Yeah, I wrote this in like an hour. Once I get around to it I’m going to revise part 1-2 and re-release them.

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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An hour! What the hell, you said you were doing it yesterday.

It’s okay I suppose. I’m surpised that 10 people would survive, long enoug to even get near the nest. Was tehre any prpose in the glooples attack on your village?

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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I was kinda working on it yesterday, although I got maybe 3 words down

Also, maybe Glooples are bloodthirsty monsters.

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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Sure. And you ahd them doing tasks. How did they manage that. I think the Queen would have a guard as well.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Yeah…Like I said, I’m going to revise it when I feel like it…I mean…soon and get some more content in there.

 
avatar for RMcD RMcD 8041 posts
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Tell me when.

 
avatar for TheGhostGamer TheGhostGamer 302 posts
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Yeah, I’ll post it here. Sometime in the next week if I don’t get distracted.