COKE MACHINE page 229

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You get a box filled with multicolored darkness. Upon looking into it, an eldritch horror stares out at you, and the multicolored darkness fades into black. Your mind shatters, and what you know as reality starts to collapse around you.

I insert a Cube God.

 
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The cube god remains stuck as the machine responds, “Please insert the side facing upwards” and the cube god pops out and hits your face.

I insert another coke machine.

 
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The coke machine doubles in size, at which point it collapses under it’s own weight into an indescribably small point and you get a black hole.
I insert the quarts of an atom.

 
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You get a nuclear bomb…boom………………….

I rebuild the machine, and I insert my x-box

 
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The machine throws a fit and criticizes you for not owning a psp, at which point it spits out the Xbox mangled and burned

I insert coffee.

 
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You get an empty coffee cup.

I insert my psp

 
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You get a sentient moody cloud wielding an oversized sword that kills you using music.

I insert a space-time paradox.

 
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As a result of the paradox, you, the machine, and everything else is forced to convert into a version of itself from a different timeline, and you find yourself staring at a coke machine outside of a gas station.
I insert a piece of string the exact size of the Planck length

 
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You get a ball of yarn… That starts bouncing off you again and again…

I insert my chiwawua

 
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You get a pitbull
I drive a car into the coke machine.

 
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You get your license taken away and a ticket.

I put my hand inside the coke machine.

 
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You get a fingerless hand.

I insert a cassette recording containing my rehearsed pleading for a can of coke.

 
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You get sprite… LOL!!

I insert a bowl of corn flakes.

 
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You get it back, but notice the machine has put dried strawberries in it.
I insert a live grenade.

 
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The machine beeps and says “unable to detect object” and the grenade pops up from the machine and into your mouth. Boom.

I insert a sprite button which I promply ripped off from the side of the machine.

 
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You get a fake Sprite, which tastes like moss.

I insert a computer mouse.

 
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You get a lab rat.

I insert the Doomguy after tricking him into thinking aliens were in the Coke Machine.

 
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The Doomsguy comes out half eaten, and in a zombified state.

I insert a fake coin.

 
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you get two real ones

i insert Razer off robot wars

 
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You get all your crapbots thrown onto you, in molten form. Until you learn better grammar, you will be painfully burned to death.

I insert a box.

 
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You get an 1000×1000×1000 rubik’s cube. I insert an coke bottle, while pounding on the machine and shouting “I WANT MY MONEY BACK!” at it.

 
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You get the letter n. When you check your wallet, you find you lost a dollar.

I insert a 500×500×500 Rubix Cube.

 
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You get a box.

I insert a MetroCard.

 
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You get a credit card.
I insert adenosine triphosphate.

 
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You get Adenosine Tri-Phosphate. (It’s a Japanese rock band. :3)

I insert Green Day. (It’s an American rock band. :3)