COKE MACHINE page 316

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You get crepe paper.
I insert a chainsaw.

 
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You get a blade.
I insert a crepe paper.

 
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(Dammit, sebba, why’d you ninja?)
You get creepypasta.
I insert a thousand needles.

 
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You get a hug from a pampa from the final fantasy franchise!
I insert lonelyness

 
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You get a chance to commit suicide.
I insert a piano.

 
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The coke machine starts playing music.
I insert super mario galaxy.

 
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You get a shiitake mushroom.
I insert Platformergamer.

 
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You get two horses.
I insert a shiitake mushroom.

 
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You get a goomba.
I insert a goomba’s tooth.

 
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You get one of mario’s teeth.
I shoot a star bit into the coin slot.

 
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You get an error message.

I take 23 shots then puke directly into the coin slot.

 
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You get a laser in your groin.
I insert a hammer.

 
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You get a nail.
I insert a laser in your groin.

 
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You get two lasers in your groin.
I insert a nail.

 
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You get a fail.

 
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You get… NOTHING! GOOD DAY, SIR!
I insert nothing.

 
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You get nothing.
I insert a hot dog.

 
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You get a frozen cat.
I insert an icicle.

 
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You get backstabed with a spycicle.
I insert a dead ringer.

 
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You get Sadako.
I insert a pistol.

 
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The coke machine aims the pistol at you and yells “FREEZE!”
I insert the internet.

 
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You get cats.
I insert a pencil.

 
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You get a pen.
I insert a Meme.

 
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You get a yo-yo.
I insert a knot.