Live, Die, Die Live and Die. page 93

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Originally posted by thedude0:

you don’t kill yourself
I jump into a black hole

Sorry, I forgot to die.

Anyway, the dragon is a baby dwarf dragon. My cat could beat it.

I take 250 aspirins.

 
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I shrink myself and take the aspirins out of your system, sadly, when I try to grow again to my regular size, I make the aspirins grow instead, crushing me… ouch…

 
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The chemical reaction of growing to your regular size dissolves the aspirins into the air and thus not crushing you.

I blast off again at mach speed into the atmosphere, burning up due to the high speeds.

 
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Luckily you had a spacesuit and a parachute so you don’t burn and you fall to the ground slowly thanks to the parachute.

My spaceship explodes in the space and there is at least 1 light year to the closest planet.

 
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You DREAMED jumping into a black hole

I stab myself with a steel knife,not plastic.PURE knife.

 
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You stabbed your finger. Congrats, you have one less finger now.

A crocodile eats me and digests me.

 
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A crocodile TOY,maybe?

I jump into the Bermuda Triangle

 
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While the triangle is a bit too small for you to jump in. It is not the Bermuda Triangle spoken of in the legends and thus are not cursed so you avert a doomed fate.

I dug too deep and met a lava engulfed death at the core of mars.

 
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Originally posted by ROFL_N00B:

I dug too deep and met a lava engulfed death at the core of mars.

The point of the game is not to poise an inevitable death, but merely to exemplify a precarious situation wherein you are on the potential throes of death, but not yet necessarily foredoomed or destined to die in any way.

Assuming that you meant you were going to fall into lava instead of having already been engulfed in the lethal substance, I bestow upon you the power of flight and you swiftly head back to level ground, safely away from the lava.

I start to memorize the infinite digits of the circumscribing whole of something divided by the length of something (hint: allusion to roundness) and my head starts to hurt. If I reach the millionth or so ordinal term in the numerical sequence, my head will have accrued so much information it is on the verge of collapsing into, you guessed it, a miniature blackhole.

 
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it seems to happen because you are insane

I find the last digit in pi causing the universe to collapse

 
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You actually found the last piece of a pie. Because you can’t do math.

I walk down a street and a snorlax falls on me.

 
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It does fall on you, or at least a clone of you. You are still alive.
I stand in the middle of ground zero and die of radiation poisoning.

 
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I went back in time and save you from got hit by the GZ

I jump into acid

 
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It was green acid you jumped into, which, despite what games say, is very rare not very acidic. It just causes mild discomfort.

I hurl myself off a hot air balloon onto pointed rocks.

 
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The hot air balloon pops off and falls into the sharp rock quicker than you.

I drink a full tub of poison

 
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After drinking several liters of poison, your stomach can’t take anything more, so you throw up, throwing up the poison which wasn’t digested yet.

A real nuke explodes on my head.

 
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luckily it was a clay version of your head placed in Hiroshima
I “fall” into a Black hole

 
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Thankfully it’s a wormhole.
I give the premier of China the finger.

 
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The premier of China looks you weirdly because of the finger you gave, but nothing happens. (Lol I don’t know what the premier of China or the finger is.)

I eat a timed bomb which is timed to explode in 5 seconds.

 
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Your stomach acids break the timer, then dissolve the bomb.
I run at the premier of China with a bowie knife.

 
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Your bowie knife disappeared somehow.
I die of insanity.

 
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I go back in time and calm you down

A nuclear bomb falls onto my head

 
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It never exploded.
I got fucked by penguins.

 
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You are raped, but you are still alive.

I dive into an acid pool which was made of 0.3 pH acid.

 
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I manipulate the gravity,so you doesn’t fall in there.

A pirate ship shoots me with REAL,STEEL Cannonball