Poetry of the Tomboy

Since poetry is technically art, this is in the right place. Some of my poems will be pretty long, and pretty ramble-y. Get used to it. I am aware that the rhythm changes from the beginning to the end of many of my poems. However, it is my inability to keep rhythm that makes my poems unique. I hope you guys will post comments about my poems, but try to keep the criticism constructive. Also, I’d like to hear some of your poems as well.

In Another Dimension
In another dimension,
Everyone has blue hair.
In another,
They have green skin.
In another,
Red eyes.
And in another,
They have all three.

In another dimension,
People are the pets.
And in another,
We have wings on our backs.
In another,
Claws on our fingers.
And in another,
We have all three.

In another dimension,
Everything is a shadow.
In another,
There is only light.
In another,
Only shades of gray.
And in another…
There is nothing.

Nothing at all,
Just black,
Black,
Black
Forever in all directions.
And there’s no floor,
So you would fall,
But you wouldn’t know,
Because there’s no air.
But there’s no gravity,
So you would float.
But there’s no food,
So you would starve.
And there’s no water,
So you’d die of thirst, too.
Unless you suffocated first,
because there’s no oxygen.
But there’s no need,
So you would live.
But you’d be afully bored,
But there’s no boredom.
Or want.
Or feelings.
Or you.
Or maybe there is.
I wouldn’t know.
Because there’s nothing,
Just black,
Black,
Black
Forever in all directions.
Or maybe there isn’t.
Nobody know.
Nobody’s been there.
Because there’s only
Nothing
In all
Directions.
In another dimension.

In the little gray box to the left side of your post, you will notice the “Edit button”, normally, used to edit…your posts….

And, well I look forward to seeing poems :]

I look forward to seeing your poems. I’d suggest keeping your thread organized, try not to double post, and give your thread a more specific title (POPPY’s Poetry or something).

Also, we have a group, called Writer’s Block here dedicated to language arts. You can feel free to post there if you want.

I know this it nitpicky, but I get very distracted by you writing “demension” rather than “dimension” I look forward to seeing more.

Ozzy123 is pleased by these poems. =P

Warning, cheesy words follow

Lol I tried writing a song (lyrics = poetry) after I had a great day and was feeling great about life. DONT JUDGE MEH

Now I’m Free

A sense of relief.
I’ve let go of the pain.
The scars fade away
Like footprints on a beach
Washed away, washed clean
Now I’m free

Forgetting the sorrows.
I lose my sadness.
The loneliness departs
Like leaves in fall
Gone till next spring.
Now I’m free.

A feeling of peace
I watch my anger disappear.
I no longer care
For the troubles of life
I have learned to live
Now I’m free.

The knowledge of something good.
I fight my demons.
Pain, sorrow, anger
All human emotions
All forgotten.
Now I’m free

I experience love
You forget the hate
You give the love’
You forgive
You forget
Now your free.

As far as I can see, that was pretty good. However, I would imagine there is little respect for higher English here, as the mean age is about 14, and many of them are being forcefed the most dreary poetry and Shakespeare. Some say Shakespeare was the best thing to happen to English, but I think he was the worst, as many a thirst for novels have been quenched with the sheer dullness of his plays. Had Shakespeare and the like been removed from curriculums worldwide, the thought that English is a boring subject would vanish, along with the travesty that is Old English. If this sort of thing were taught in schools, people would be able to relate, and likely enjoy the language in itself.

Inspiration

Thank you world for the inspiration,
Thank you as well, my great nation,
Thank you all in my town
For just being there, just being around,
Thanks to all my friends and family,
Its been great, just you and me-ee-ee,
I know, you think, I’m just spouting lies,
But truly your great, just look in my eyes,
For the joy you all bring, is just too much,
I love you for this, and that, and such and such,
You bring such joy, I can’t even explain,
You bring such memories, to my brain,
So I made this poem for you,
Just to say the words, thank and you…

Wrote this for English, 10 poems in one month O_O i like it =D

And I hate Shakespeare as well…

Originally posted by JohannasGarden:

I know this it nitpicky, but I get very distracted by you writing “demension” rather than “dimension” I look forward to seeing more.

I have a few spelling issues. Thanks for telling me. I fixed it.

I Wonder When

I wonder when
The world will die.
It’s got to happen eventually.

I wonder when
We’ll figure out
That peace is better than war.

I wonder when
People will stop
Harrassing everyone else.

I wonder when
Earth will be
Sucked into a black hole.

I wonder when
We will start
To actually take care of the planet.

I wonder when
We will discard
All of our money; It’s useless.

I wonder…
I wonder when…
I wonder when the stars will burn out.
When the sky turns red.
When we all murder each other.
When the earth stops turning.
When the sun floats away.
When we turn primitive again.

I wonder when
I have to go to bed tonight.

Oh, whoops, i didn’t know this was gunna be your thread only, my bad… I just saw Jedi’s poem and went w/ it O_O

Also, I like the poem, it kinda groups everything people talk about, but don’t do anything about, into a single poem.

Good Morning Mr. Stevens

The thunder of bells
Wakes me at ten
I have to leave
But I don’t know when

I see others in the hall
Dressed in blue and white
Others in black and silver
A man starts a fight

Forgetting my duties
I stare at the young man
His face slick with blood
I don’t understand

Smoke sputters out from
underneath the wall
A flash of black and silver
I stumble and fall

My nose is screaming
A horrid sensation
I had never felt so alive
Since my creation

A sheet of black
Crawls over my brow
My time is over
My time was now

Thump tha Thump tha Thump tha Thump tha Thump

Darkness

Originally posted by ozzy123:

Oh, whoops, i didn’t know this was gunna be your thread only, my bad… I just saw Jedi’s poem and went w/ it O_O

No, it’s not only mine. That name just sounds cooler than Poetry. And it’s all I could think of.

Originally posted by ozzy123:

Also, I like the poem, it kinda groups everything people talk about, but don’t do anything about, into a single poem.

You know, I made that up on the spot. I felt like writing a poem and it really turned out well. Some of mine are like that, but most of the ‘on-the-spot’ ones are crap.

MainFrame: Cool poem

Poppy: I see… =P

Ny1 like my poem at all(?)

Originally posted by ozzy123:

MainFrame: Cool poem

Poppy: I see… =P

Ny1 like my poem at all(?)

Thanks,
and it sort of feels like a song, which is good :D

:D

Immature Love, Mature Love
Immature love
Is love that loves
Only those who are similar,
Because difference scares them.
Mature love
Is love that loves
Even when-
No.
Mature love
Is love that loves
Especially when
The lovers are different,
And they can move around it.

Immature love
Loves for need,
because they don’t understand.
Mature love
Loves only
Out of love, not of need.

Immature love
Speaks.
It says,
I love you.
Because it assures them of love.
Mature love
Simply loves,
Nothing more.
Love needs no words.
Another one of my on-the-spot poems. Maybe they’re not mostly crap after all…

Ye’ poem speak-ith the truth… =P

Originally posted by ozzy123:

Ye’ poem speak-ith the truth… =P

Thanks :D I like it when I get comments like this. I have plenty of poems that are just plain crap in a notebook somewhere, but I’m getting better at writing.

Yah, alot of art doesn’t get commented on, so i always at the least try to say I like or dislike something… that way you don’t feel like it was a waste of time =P

Most of the time, posting in Art forums is a waste of time. Kids and teens don’t usually go willingly to these types of forums. Which is one of the many things that makes me and unusual teen.

=O I am not wasting my time here… so thats dead wrong…

She’s a rainbow and she loves the peaceful life,
knows I’ll go crazy if I don’t go crazy tonight.

There’s a part of me in the chaos that’s quiet,
and there’s a part of you that wants me to riot.

---

That’s part of I’ll Go Crazy if I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight, by U2. Lovethat song.