Feedback on my design?

I’m designing and embroidering a kiku han-eri (chrysanthemum collar) in the style of this one:

And this is the design I’ve drawn up. If any part of it looks “odd” or you think something should be altered, let me know! Thanks.

(Edit: I won’t be fixing the fuzziness as it wont be an issue)

That’s awesome! My only observation is that the vines and flowers on the model piece are all very uniform. The vines are a consistent width, and the flowers are almost identical (and equally sized). I think that’s what makes the pattern really work.

This looks like a killer project. Super cool.

Thanks Pete. I’ll make sure I keep that in mind when I can start stitching it.
I’m not sure if the dots should be more uniform that I have them… Hmm.
The thing is I’ve seen a few attempts at this kind of thing and with uniform dots your eyes really notice if any single one is out of line and since you use thread they’re not dots so much a short dashes… and then my eye loves to join them up. Ahh, decisions.

(Somewhat) refined design.
I dyed the red base tonight, and now it looks like I killed someone….

Awesome. It’s looking nice and uniform. I would caution you on those tangents that accidentally occur, and encourage you to consider the negative space between the objects as characters as important as the vines, leaves, and flowers. I see several places where two separate objects almost touch and create a tangent. My eyes went to these places. Uniformity is the defining characteristic. Also, it appears there is one flower with no vines, and it’s surrounded by a large space. I’d address this somehow.

Consulting the reference, it’s hard to find any significant empty spaces, or places where things are more congested.

I’d follow that same rule with the beads (or dots). Keep them irregularly distributed but uniformly spaced.

Looking good!

Looks very good!

is that your home work you should be doing :)

Looks very good! I hope to see it when it’s finished! ;)

Does the negative space feel more balanced now?

Yeah, I think so! Don’t you?

It looks more like a pattern to me now. Not that it doesn’t before, but now it’s moreso. I think revising the drawing was worth it. The flowers are all about the same size, the vines follow the same kind of pattern, and the negative spaces are all more or less uniform.

This thing is gonna be cool.

I agree – I’m surprised how much difference that half hour or so made.
I’m not in the habit of revising designs.. Perhaps I’ll need to fix that.

Haha, for sure!

I’m a BIG proponent of iterating on designs and concepts until it’s as good as I can make it. I don’t know anything I’ve ever just done in one shot that I really like.

I like it more with the negative space. The scattered dots made it look a little cluttered (IMO.) But it looks great so far.