Kids cutting themselves...

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Hello there. I do not want to say the ages of these kids or the names… So please bear with me as I tell you what has been happening in my school/life.

In my school I now know that a bunch of girls cut themselves because they feel sad. These where some of the responses I got back from asking them why did they do it.

“well… the pain on the inside is to bad so i cut my slef to make me feel better”

“I know that others do it so that way i do it too.”

“well my boyfriend makes me sad so that is why I do it.”

“i do it because i am addicted to it”

When they responded with those replies I felt a little sick to my stomach and my mind was hurting. I said that cutting themselves is no awenser to any problem. They then said that it was because it took the emotional pain away by hurting themselves. I said that is just pain x2…

So community, can you please give me any advice on how to help people stop or how to explain to them that it is not the best way to cope with pain. Also my mind hurts when i think that it makes them feel better so do you have any suggestions to help that too? Any help is good for me. And also. Please be serious.

 
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Ask them why they feel sad. Find the core reason(s) and address it/them.

 
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1)Tell your teachers
2)If that doesn’t work, try to explain to them wny they should not do this.
3)As a last resort, try to force them not to do it.

Also, I know how kids behave. Unless they’re all insane, you got trolled.

 
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It isn’t really an issue; as long as they keep it from causing permanent damage. There are plenty of worse ways they could deal with their problems.

 
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Originally posted by Captain_Catface:

It isn’t really an issue; as long as they keep it from causing permanent damage. There are plenty of worse ways they could deal with their problems.

The thing is that cutting yourself is quite likely to cause some permanent damage. There are better ways to deal with these problems, and none of them are as messy as cutting yourself.

 
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Originally posted by Captain_Catface:

It isn’t really an issue; as long as they keep it from causing permanent damage. There are plenty of worse ways they could deal with their problems.

ugh.

 
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Originally posted by ILOVEArmorgames:

So community, can you please give me any advice on how to help people stop or how to explain to them that it is not the best way to cope with pain. Also my mind hurts when i think that it makes them feel better so do you have any suggestions to help that too? Any help is good for me. And also. Please be serious.

Tis rare that I produce such a seemingly unempathic response, but here we go…

Few things are worse than someone with zero knowledge, understanding or experience trying to give advice on something like this. Stepping on the wrong eggshell, which is very easy, can do more harm than good. So my advice would be to (harsh as it sounds, and probably easier said than done) not try to do any helping yourself. Leave that to the professionals, or at least to someone with better understanding of the issue.

That, and… hate myself for saying it, but a good number (not all, but a fair old amount) of ‘cutters’ are overdramatic attention-seekers who wouldn’t know sadness or pain if it jumped up and slapped them in the face with a wet kipper. Two of your responses suggest that, and one less peer fussing over them might give them less incentive to do it.

So yeah… detach yourself, definitely pass on the information to someone in authority if you’re able, but don’t try to hero it yourself.

 
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They have deep emotional problems, and as a fellow class mate you have little power to change that. Its core problem is probably their family, or them being heavily confused over how someone close to them are acting.

Sadly, I’d say that you are most likely only to make it worse, if you are not willing to sacrefise all your time and motivation to try and help them.

Try to understand how they feel. Empathy and sympathy is the core way to help them. Get close to them, be as supportive as you possibly can be, but keep sexual feelings out of it. Finally, try and get to know their familty, and try and find the core problem.

If you are not willing to do all that, it can probably be good to know that cutting is usually just a phase. My step sister used to cut herself, but that state only lasted about a year (which could also be seen as a long time i suppose), then she went to be normal agian. Cutters usually don’t suicide either, if I understand it correctly.

Or, they are just some stupid Emos that dont actually have a problem, they just do it by fashion and to get attention. In that case, fuck their problems.

 
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Neil is correct. They have physiological problems and need to be seen by professionals.

 
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I have somebody in my health class that says she cut herself so she has lost all feeling her arm. I have no idea why they do it.

 
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As others have said, tell your teachers or your school counselors. This is not a healthy way for them to deal with their problems. In my experience with cutters, it sometimes takes years of therapy for them to stop cutting. They may appear to stop, temporarily…but will be cutting in another, unseen location. The best you can do is to be a friend if you want, but most of all, let an adult know what’s going on so they can get some professional help.

 
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Just detach yourself from them. The majority of people who cut themselves have perfectly fine lives and don’t know what real emotional pain is at all. Direct them to a professional if you can, but otherwise there is nothing you can (or should) do in a situation like this.

I.E. They have psychological problems and you shouldn’t bother with them.

 
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bear=/=bare
Heil grammar!

 
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even though that’s spelling… how come people never call them spelling nazis? hmm…

 
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Originally posted by LV_kekkaishi:

bear=/=bare
Heil grammar!

You’re right. Which is why he said “bear with me” (the correct form) rather than “bare with me” (which would imply getting naked together). Sources: 1 2

Further, if you misspell a word, it’s a spelling error (e.g., “yuo” for “you”). However, if you mix up two homophones (but technically do not have any non-words in the sentence) it’s a grammar error (e.g. “you’re” for “your”). That’s why it’s called “grammar nazi” and not “spelling nazi”.

On topic, I wouldn’t go as far as Ayaniika said and totally detach from the ‘cutters’, but you don’t want to do more harm than good. Direct them to a professional, or inform a responsible adult that you think they might be harming themselves. Then, do not give them any advice or egg them on. You might screw it up, and then you’ll probably feel guilty for a really, really long time.

Also remember, however, that they might legitimately be going through a hard time. Don’t assume that they’re just being attention hogs, because they very well may be going through tough times. Just because you can’t understand why they’d do it doesn’t mean they aren’t seriously troubled and using it as an (albeit poor) coping mechanism.

 
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get them help from a counselor or teacher, although i’m not sure whether they’re parents becoming involved is always a good idea (parents maybe the ones who are causing the sadness, or may make it worse by freaking out in worry). if the counselors are succesful, they probably will need to almost start over. find new friends (the old ones are probably the ones who influneced them to do it in the first place) for support (without being able to depend on the pain of the cut). this would be a great time to offer some friendship.

 
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Originally posted by helltank:

1)Tell your teachers
2)If that doesn’t work, try to explain to them wny they should not do this.
3)As a last resort, try to force them not to do it.

Also, I know how kids behave. Unless they’re all insane, you got trolled.

Doing 1 or 3 most likely would only make it worse. You can’t force a person not to inflict self harm unless you plan to lock them in a padded room with restraints 24/7. You have to convince them otherwise. There’s also the chance that these people are just attention whoring, but i’ll give them the benefit of the doubt. Forcing someone to stop would be like trying to get into your house by driving your car into it rather then trying to find the keys to the problem or door. It is difficult for both parties here, but slowly working through it with counselling and possibly anti-depressants or other medications would be the best way to do it. It would be best for professionals to handle this.

 
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Do they cut their wrists? As that probably isn’t the most hurty place, I’d say they’re attention whoring.

Was it horizontal or vertical cuts?

 
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Well,i’m no expert,but they would be considered emo via bullies.Emo is a word for emotional.I cut myself.I’m not “emo”,though.I am what you would call Steve-O or Johny Knoxville.A Jack-Ass.Anyway back to the point,people like that tend to cut them selves due to fear, sadness,and the thought that death would relieve them.They think that because they were abused sexually,physiclly,or EMOtionally.Or beacause the accidentally broke the PS3.Reply or friend me.Shotgunvat…OUT!