Kongregate: Play free games online

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) Builder, "How do want your castle built?" King, " I want it balanced on two pieces of wood."

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F (986)

Hockeynut2287

Nov. 28, 2010

Under rating threshold (show) I'm not a failure for not killing the knight, the knight is a winner for balancing 10 tons of stone on his head...

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F (1672)

Etewen

Mar. 29, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) "How do we protect the king, sir?" "I know, have him stand on this ledge, precariously balanced above this plank of spikes." "Brilliant, sir!"

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F (1384)

jedimaster107

Mar. 25, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) It seems to me that a competent general would bring more than five rocks to a siege...

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F (1291)

benmaster545

Nov. 27, 2010

Under rating threshold (show) general, the king died, fell over, hit the queen, and then she died.

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F (1252)

Harry1234114

Jun. 23, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) you people do know that this was made b4 angry birds right? I'm tired of hearing how ths is an angry birds rip off when this was clearly made b4 angry birds.

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F (15)

Kapteindood

Nov. 26, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) "So, my engineers. it has been a while since we came up with the idea to sling three rocks at once. What's the next brilliant idea?" "A BIGGER ROCK!" It then took them a few weeks to come up with the idea to fire multiple bigger rocks, or the use of even bigger rocks...

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F (15)

livinghell1235

Jul. 18, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) King - "Okay, you're going to take down all the castles ni the land" ME - "Yes sir, I'll go get my trebuchet, and a squadron of men to attack the--" King - "NO! Only use the trebuchet" Me - "Oh, uh, okay. I'll get the explo--" King - "NO, you can't use those until later" ME - "Well, okay, I'll get the thousands of roc--" King - "NOO, only use 5 per castle!! Now go, and destroy those castles!" ME - "...I don't want to anymore..."

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F (15)

killzcobra

Feb. 12, 2013

Under rating threshold (show) Sir, we are almost out of spare kings and queens, I think we might want to make a castle that actually lets us fight back against the enemy.

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F (8)

Trivius

Dec. 23, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) Crush the Castle, the fun physics game where the laws of physics don't apply!!

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F (14)

killzcobra

Feb. 12, 2013

Under rating threshold (show) I won, there is no way the king can do a headstand much longer.

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F (8)

danyol

Aug. 12, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) Why does the reset button not work after your last shot? Seems that's the most common time to hit the reset button...

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F (35)

Hanksoul97

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) king: well, how did the battle go? soldier: we killed all but one of them, your magesty king: YOU FOOL! you have disgraced yourself and must be banished!

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F (12)

demoExpert

Aug. 21, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) They're shooting boulders at us! What do we do?" King: I say we sit here and wait for them to kill us.

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F (9)

Dragonvargon

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) I don't know what it is, but I can never seem to "overshoot" anything and nearly all projectiles have a max limit of "in the middle of the castle"

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F (11)

charrrlie

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) 3 seconds? I can't see the fun and my win on last level wasn't computed... Terrible idea

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F (11)

GanonsSpirit

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) Why can't I just hit the reset button after I launch the last of my ammo? I don't like having to wait through the countdown.

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F (28)

cmikaiti

Jun. 23, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) Why is there a timer after you throw your last stone (that you can't hit reset to override)? Just let it sit there until you either win or hit reset. The quit/reset menu is useless.

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F (10)

callofdutypro99

Feb. 21, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) one rock.......... ten people dead. I like this ratio.

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F (10)

TwinsofMLB

Feb. 19, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) King: "How many did we lose?" Soldier: "14, sir!" King: "And them?" Soldier: "5 rocks, sir!" King: "Ha! They're royal failures."

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F (10)

ninjacritter414

Jan. 8, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) "we're under attack. what should we do?" "let's just stand here and hope they miss"

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F (10)

JarlHiros

Sep. 16, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) They said I was daft for building a castle in a swamp. But I built it all the same! It sank into the swamp. So I built it again. That castle sank into the swamp. The third castle burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. The fourth castle, the fourth castle stayed up! And now it's the strongest castle around...until hit by flying rocks.

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F (10)

bigmoneymill

Jun. 17, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) Ahh what a nice view the birds are flying the clouds are sailing and that rock is coming right towards MY FAAACC.....

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F (10)

NicktheNinja22

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) "Quick, bring me my strongest weapon!" (a few seconds later) "A rock? Well if thats our greatest weapon...."

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F (10)

4sostrander

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) "I want you, trusty siege general, to crush all the castles in the land!" "Sir, those are cottages with three of your subjects living in them." "NONSENSE! THEY ARE CASTLES! CRUSH THEM!" "Okay, Sir..."

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F (10)

kingsolomon333

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) So, why doesnt the smaller rock fly farther than the larger rock? Seems that the same force applied on a smaller object would make it fly farther and faster...

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F (10)

Toadkid

Feb. 22, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) In court ''So your majesty, you say that the king was domesticly violent to you?'' ''Yes, he would punch me and kick me, force me to balance ten tons of brick on my head...But the worst time was...when he fell on me..''

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F (10)

awesomescott

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) the worst way to die.... having a servant mindlessly fall on you and kill you instantly

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F (125)

tetos1995

Jun. 23, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) HEY stop mentioning angry birds u shouldn't compare games with each other....angry birds is about some angry birds who try to kill those green things and not destroying castles....this is called crush the castle not angry siege so the purpose of the game is to crush castles....however this is before angry birds

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F (9)

JimTheHobo

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) Sir Both kings and queens have perished, as have the 4 princesses, but don't worry, the Archer survived! We can rebuild the kingdom now that the unstoppable trebuche has been halted by a 13yr old with a stick trapped under the 2000 tonne ruins of our "Castle" has scared them off! =D

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F (36)

aegon1

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) when the king falls really fast he will bounce

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F (9)

KillerDonkey95

Jun. 1, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) King: So your saying none of our castles are actually secured? Servant: No sir, we thought it'd be better if we just precariously placed all the pieces on top of each other.... King: Thank God we're not under siege it'd only take one catapult to wipe out the kingdom.... >.>

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F (9)

Recruitsoldier

Jan. 14, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) S'wait, you can get killed by a person falling on you, but you can survive a huge rock landing squarely on your head?

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F (9)

DesiredKinto

Sep. 11, 2010

Under rating threshold (show) I wish you could throw farther :/ Like in the second one. rofl. I can barely reach the castle in level 23

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F (9)

NuclearTorpedo

Aug. 28, 2010

Under rating threshold (show) Retreating because of ammo depletion? Couldn't you just... bring in some more? They're stones, for crying out loud! They're naturally occuring!

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F (23)

simsimdimsim

Sep. 12, 2010

Under rating threshold (show) "You are a royal failure and are forced to retreat" - OH NO, RUN AWAY! The inanimate enemy is going to get us because a piece of castle didn't fall onto their heads!

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F (409)

oranosskyman

Mar. 7, 2013

Under rating threshold (show) "general, we just recieved a new type of weapon far superior to our old ones" - "what could possibly be better than a rock?" - "three rocks tied together" *gasp*"impossible!!"

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F (5)

omark96

Jun. 23, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) Sir, they have a gigantic catapult standing outside the castle! What should we do?" "Nothing, just remember to put the king on the most dangerous place you can find" "Ehh what?" "Don't you dare question my orders!

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F (8)

GINGERLIKE

Sep. 28, 2011

Under rating threshold (show) "Oh my god, what happened to Wilkes?" "He fell over" "Shit, that's the third one this week"

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F (21)

Louiezed

Jan. 2, 2012

Under rating threshold (show) Captain of the Guard: The castel is perfect sir this thing could hold out to an earthquake. King: what about a peble? Captain of the Guard:......crap