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"Sir, we need to retreat ! We don't have any shot left, and we've got a princess who is still alive under 10 tons of rocks"... OWNED
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Soldier - "General the King and Queen and all of there Knights have died in the assault, the only survivor was a servant." General - "A SERVANT!? WE MUST RETREAT!" Soldier "But sir, it's just a ser... *Sigh* I'll tell the men to retreat, again."
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It is great, and I have loved it for a very, very, very, very, very long time. Slave:" what shall our castle be like your highness" King: "I want it to be susceptible to damage from pebbles"
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"So, my engineers. it has been a while since we came up with the idea to sling three rocks at once. What's the next brilliant idea?" "A BIGGER ROCK!"
It then took them a few weeks to come up with the idea to fire multiple bigger rocks, or the use of even bigger rocks...
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"Sir, the enemy is right outside our castle. What do you propose we do?" "We stand still until they either topple us, or run out of stone." "Good idea sir!"
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Wow looking back at this it looks so much more different then I remember it back in the day *Checks to see if I have the badge* ;-;
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Lvl 17 is as frustrating as it gets. If I wanted to feel powerless and do a bunch of repetitive, yet ultimately pointless actions, I'd go to work. Finally got it on the 500th try or so by pure luck. If you don't care about the badge of the day, play one of the sequels instead.
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The real reason the last shot time is stupid is because it prevents you from resetting... yes, game, I know I didn't kill that last knight and he won't die in the next few seconds.
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In court ''So your majesty, you say that the king was domesticly violent to you?'' ''Yes, he would punch me and kick me, force me to balance ten tons of brick on my head...But the worst time was...when he fell on me..''
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Why the reset button doesn't work after you fire your last thing is beyond me. Resetting takes forever considering some levels, you probably won't get lucky and do it first try. Medium badge is too hard to be a medium badge because of the last level. The entire game hinges around pixel perfect timing, which isn't so much a game as much as it is, find the exact pixel you need and time it perfectly. 0 stars, waste of a badge, don't waste your time with this.
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I just made a castle in which the princess fell from the top of the screen on to a spike, in revenge for level 24. She didn't die.
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If you're having trouble battering down a castle, keep firing away as fast as possible with 3 stone clusters while the walls are still shaking from your last shot.
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i love how it makes you wait 3 sec. just to show you that you lost. and how it starts counting before it all the parts stop moving when you do have a chance at winning.
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You gotta love Kongregate's version of "Physics". :) Ya got Roadkill Revenge, where the physics themselves give an almost completely random result every turn. Ya got 99 Bricks & Super Stacker, where the stack of what is supposed to be SOLID objects bounces up and down like it's made of jelly. And here ya got Crush the Castle, where buildings can safely wobble on 2 x 4's and pieces of wood and stone get hit with BOMBS and still stay in one piece. :D
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King: You did it! you crushed all the castles! You're a royal success.
Me: No. The enemy buliders are just royal idiots.
King: Oh.
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Ow man, how badly designed is that last castle... Really pure luck to get rid of it. Glad the second opus came out much improved !
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knight: sir, are castle was destroyed King: WHAT?! HOW?! knight: some dude with a catapult shot a pebble at up King: WHAT HOW IS THAT POSSABLE THAT CASTLE HAD OVER 3000 BLOCKS knight: yes but my friend put it on his head
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Engineer: "General, I'm afraid we lost the war"
General: "But didn't we kill the King, queen and all their knights?"
Engineer: "Yes, but there's a servant buried under the rubble of their castle."
General: "Curses!"
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Well, this game is all about doing the same excat thing over and over until a failure magically becomes a success. I've had more fun with diarrhea than with this game. Had it not been a daily badge...
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Lookout: There is a trebuchet trying to destroy the castle. the west side of the castle is completely destroyed and 4 people have already been killed. What should we do? King: Just have everybody stand where they are and wait. Don't fight back. The enemy will run out of ammo and retreat.
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Knight: "Sir, we need to evacuate. The enemy is going to demolish our castle" King: "Let's wait and see if they really are"
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King - "Okay, you're going to take down all the castles ni the land" ME - "Yes sir, I'll go get my trebuchet, and a squadron of men to attack the--" King - "NO! Only use the trebuchet" Me - "Oh, uh, okay. I'll get the explo--" King - "NO, you can't use those until later" ME - "Well, okay, I'll get the thousands of roc--" King - "NOO, only use 5 per castle!! Now go, and destroy those castles!" ME - "...I don't want to anymore..."
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"We've destroyed the castle, killed the King, the Queen, the Princess and all the soldiers. No, wait!! OMG there's one guy left alive underneath the rubble - RETREAT!!!"
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"Ok, we managed to hold him off, but out of the 20 of us, we 3 are the only ones left. maybe we should find a better castle design before he comes back?" "Naaaaahh."