Recent posts by LethalMutiny on Kongregate

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Topic: Kongregate / Things kong should do to improve site

What.

 
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Topic: Forum Games: Forum Games / BOLD - Round 3: Short Stories

Unbearable
An FPS where you shout at bears with a passive-aggressive sidekick.

Platform: PC only

Genre: Shooter

Story: You, the unnamed hero, a new army boot camp graduate, are sent on a mission the likes of which have never been seen. One morning you awake to an urgent call from a leading five star general that he requests your presence in a remote Alaskan location immediately. The call of duty cannot go unanswered.

You arrive the next morning to not the sight of hundreds of soldiers, but two, the general and another man you’ve never seen before.

“Soldier! Meet Passiivinen Ymosodol, one of the finest soldiers I’ve ever met. I’ve brought you two here to embark on a top-secret mission. There will be no questions. There will be no gripes. You will be hunting bears in the wilderness. Hunting them not with your weapons… but with your words. Yell at enough of them in enough spots to never want these bears to want to come out of hiding ever again. This isn’t an FPS like you’re use to. This is a First Person Shouter. Shout at them until they give in to you! OFF TO IT!”

With that, there were no more questions as you and your partner in crime were off into the woods… to yell at bears.

Objective: Shout bears into submission! Once 1,000 bears have been passive-aggressively yelled into hiding, you win.

Gameplay: Through your travels across Alaska, you will learn various new things to yell at bears. Such favorites with reviewers include, “Who combed your fur this morning? Your mom?” and “Where’s the gym? Oh wait, you probably wouldn’t know anyway” Travel the expansive wilderness looking for various types of bears, some more difficult to insult that others. Either sneak up and insult them or yell it loud and proud.

Controls: WASD/arrow keys move. Left click to insult.

Ending: Once you insult 1,000 bears, the game just ends and we wonder why exactly you wasted your time playing this.

Replay Value: High, with over 2,000 passive-aggressive threats to hear from your sidekick, you’ll want to play through multiple times to hear them all!

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Stagnation

Originally posted by graveyard890:

Does it have to be games that keep Kong alive? The only chat that actually cares about games now is Your Pants… Also, why not chat in some chat rooms to meet new people and friends, then you will not call Kong dead again

You care about us way too much. Flattering.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Testing something - Will remove soon (trying to post a picture but having trouble)

I can help with the testing.

 
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Topic: Forum Games: Forum Games / BOLD - Round 3: Short Stories

Written about Anger.

I can’t believe she would do this. After all we’ve been through. After how well I’ve treated her. After all the memories we’ve made through the years.

bzzt bzzt Babe I’m so sorry, please come back and let’s talk.

Where did I go wrong to deserve this? To be replaced behind my back. To find them in my OWN home, all because I said I’d be at the office late. It was a white lie, it was her birthday and I was planning a big surprise without her knowing. Apparently she had more important birthday plans.

bzzt bzzt Kevin, please forgive me. Just call me. Please.

I’d been driving for a while without a destination or a plan, I saw a lighthouse off in the distance and decided to pull over and get out. It was peaceful out here, I didn’t know where I was exactly, but I was out of that house and away from her. Everything was perfect out here.

bzzt bzzt If you won’t come home, then I’ll come find you.

About an hour passed as I sat on the steps of the lighthouse just staring out into the water and letting my mind wander. I became engulfed with my surroundings and my mind rested easier. It rested easy until a car slowed down and turned towards the lighthouse. Guess who.

“Kevin… dear… please come home, it’s 11:30pm, I’m worried about you.”

“Nicole. Did you really think driving all the way out here to come talk to me was a good idea? After what I walked home to this evening?”

”I’m so… so sorry. I’m a horrible person.

”You’re a horrible person? Is that really all you have to say? We’ve been together for 4 years now and you just THREW IT ALL AWAY.”

”I love you… but I need to do this.”

”Do WHAT? What could be worse than what you’ve d-“

I woke up in the hospital three days later. I didn’t know how I got there or what had happened until a doctor filled me in. The guy who I found with my woman had been hiding in the trunk of her car and snuck up behind me with a pipe and knocked the back of my cranium in. A passerby stopped when they noticed me a couple hours after the incident. The police were alerted and those bastards took the police on a 30 minute high speed chase.

A spike trip popped three of their four tires and the police finally caught them. I’ve never been so angry in my life a person who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, to start a family with, yet been so happy to see them get what they deserved.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Re-playing Extents of Surely Terrible Activities that are Really Tiring (A Kongregate Tournament) [Sixth Finals end July 7 22:00 EST]

Originally posted by DreadPiratWesley:


Do I get an award for being the closest to dying?

 
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Topic: Forum Games: Forum Games / BOLD - Round 3: Short Stories

SIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGNSIGN

Behold, Our Lavish Diction

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Post Your Wins.

Originally posted by chiragpatel00:

I completed Bloons Tower Defense 1 with 40 lives left using Cheat Engine

This guy.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / The Four Kings Tournament [Finals!]

Originally posted by CypherDextrous:
Originally posted by CalmWaters:

Hey, guys. Sorry about the ridiculously long wait for the prizes. I’ve been ridiculously busy between school, work, preparing for graduation, as well as a choir concert and practicing driving to finally get my Driver’s License. I’ll be sending the PM to Candyman tomorrow. Again, sorry about the wait!

Been a week since this post, any word yet?

In chat just now “I have pinkeye leave me alone”

 
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Topic: Kongregate / That time I spied on Bowser's Castle for science.

All that time I modded in BC inflated the number severely, I’m sure.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Upcoming Badges!

Since others are on the subject now, which is great, here’s a list from back in late 2013 of some games that were good candidates then. Too lazy to check them now and see what’s been badged/hasn’t has good ratings yadda yadda Here you go

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Upcoming Badges!

While this whole whatever is going on up there, due to the lack of “better” games, if you will recently, can we please badge some older games. I know this has been said a hundred times but yet it never happens. I don’t care if the rating is below 3.8, or even 3.5. I don’t care if it’s from 2007 and has been overlooked. The point is, people want badges. What are we getting? Not enough badges. Greg hasn’t posted in this thread since May 22nd, there’s no communication here. We’ve had not even 60 badges in all of 2015 and it’s the end of May. If the problem is Greg being too busy, there’s an entire community here willing to help.

/rant

 
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Topic: Kongregate / The Four Kings Tournament [Finals!]

So how about those prizes for the tourney I didn’t play in.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / The Four Kings Tournament [Finals!]

Originally posted by CalmWaters:

Hey, guys. Sorry about the ridiculously long wait for the prizes. I’ve been ridiculously busy between school, work, preparing for graduation, as well as a choir concert and practicing driving to finally get my Driver’s License. I’ll be sending the PM to Candyman tomorrow. Again, sorry about the wait!

You’ve been so busy you haven’t been able to send a 5 minute PM since April 3rd?

 
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Topic: Off-topic / Who's Your Favorite Youtuber?

Retsupurae.

 
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Topic: Forum Games: Forum Games / Co-Captain Caption Calamity - Shelved :(

Copypastaing Prec’s post for simplicity.

Sup shortie <3 – 2/10

Hi Gandalf! – 2/10

I’ll go get my miners helmet – 2/10

You want some of my water? – 1/10

He seems to have high expectations on her – 4/10

Gulliver’s daughter first voyage – 5/10

Hey sexy! You come here often? – 1/10

He always was confused by the feelings he got when reading The BFG. – 7/10

I think I’m high; Man: I disagree – 7/10

I’m not a giant. I have big bones! – 3/10

Here in this picture, we see a tall and fat old lady looking down on his husband, and she’s telling him how sexy he is when he’s that small. The husband replies, “You’re much more sexy. Look at you, bending over in that pose! Ooh, so sexy.” They’re admiring each other. Except, turns out, it was all an illusion created by the highly trained super monkeys who are currently throwin’ dem darts at dem bloons. The lady is actually 1 inch tall, while the husband is 9 feet tall! How cool is that! Wait… what? – 2/10

Sup Shortie? – 2/10

I told you eating that water cooler was a bad idea. – 4/10

This guy is impressed over his newly bought Russian wife – 2/10

The only one who may call him ‘shorty’ – 2/10

Please don’t hurt me! – 3/10

A Fashion Adviser Helps a Woman Feel Attractive in High Heels Preparing for a Dinner Date. – 3/10

Please take off your heels, you’ll scratch the linoleum. – 6/10

Excuse Me Sir, Do You Have a Moment to Talk About Jesus Christ? – 6/10

Sup shawty – 2/10

That is one tall drink of water. – 8/10

“You know, you don’t actually need the high heels.” – 8/10

Feminism – 3/10

I’m glad we could finally see eye-to-eye. – 8/10

I’m so glad I moved to Texas! – 5/10

I thought you said you designed this house with me in mind, Geoff! – 7/10

And you’re a cute little fella, you are, although I didn’t think you were this kind of cute. – 3/10

Honey, I shrunk the boyfriend – 6/10

With you it’s always leg day. – 6/10

I can tell you’re not looking into my eyes. – 6/10

Does my butt look big in this? – 7/10

I like your shoes. – 3/10

Recorded with potato – 1/10

 
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Topic: Kongregate / The Four Kings Tournament [Finals!]

Taking my name out of the tourney, good luck everyone.

 
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Topic: Forum Games: Forum Games / Co-Captain Caption Calamity - Shelved :(

Sign.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / The Four Kings Tournament [Finals!]

Fuck it.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Best of 2014 Quest voting!

Run 3.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Upcoming Badges!

Originally posted by 123aaa789:

There have been 8 badges in the past 48 days, as well there were only 7 in January, and 6 in December in general. It’s not for a lack of good games (there have been multiple new games suggested per page of this thread), it just seems to be a lack of time being spent on the task (greg said he’s been focusing more on non-badge things lately). I wonder if hiring a second badge maker again, or at least someone to do what other things greg’s been doing, would be a good thing to try again.

The lack of any communication is what worries me.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Upcoming Badges!

RIP badges.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Kongregator of the Year 2014!

Originally posted by LakeSnow:

Horrible idea. Everyone will always vote for Your Pants peeps or NETTZ peeps, or KV peeps. And then the other chats users and mods won’t get recognized.

God forbid people from other chatrooms see this and vote for them.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / Upcoming Badges!

Originally posted by greg:

I just need a name. Please suggest names if you can think of any!

Best I could come up with was a play on all that glitters is gold, All That Beams Is Bronze.

 
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Topic: Kongregate / December '14 Suggestion Thread

It’s a minor suggestion, but the ability to see scores on your comments from clicking comments on your profile.