Recent posts by Cryptosporidian on Kongregate

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Topic: Kongregate / New Profile rolling out to everybody


A holistic analysis

Once upon a time, little Jimmy Crypto was chatting away, and was asked by a jolly young fellow to check out his profile. So little Jimmy Crypto accessed this profile, and was mighty shocked, for it all seemed to different! Many things ran through little Jimmy Crypto’s mind, among which were “Ew, what the hell have they done to the account page?” and “well, I suppose we all get used to Kongregate’s changes eventually and that this might just be my knee-jerk reaction to something new” and “All the same – yuck.” So then little Jimmy Crypto looked at his own account and decided to examine as many facets of it as possible, as some other people have already done here in their own way, to point out what he thinks are the bad changes, the good changes, and the changes that might show some promise if modified.

The Avatar Box
A bigger picture is a cooler picture for the accounts page – if anyone would like an example of this, take a look at the accounts of the administrators. And if any of you wish to fix your problem of having a small box shaped image in a larger box, I think that you can just re-upload your image, assuming that most of your avatars have a size larger than 140 by 140.

For the majority of players, I believe that this is a snazzy change, since most images have a good enough resolution to look fine in the box. For me personally, it’s not a snazzy change. This is because I have a little tradition of mine – 119 ‘crypto’ eyeball designs were made for me and others by friends and acquaintances, and the vast majority of them are 50 by 50. So when I look at my profile, there’s a small little eye sitting in a big gray box, which I don’t like.

The New Blue Buttons (Warning: analysis is overly nit-picky)
The following is my guess about the psychology behind the blue buttons on the account pages of individuals other than ourselves: If we make bold, large-ish buttons right up top that encourage users to be ‘social’ (i.e. to follow and private message users) while hiding away the ‘anti-social’ buttons under a gear (i.e. mute, report abuse), we’re encouraging positive social activity. That’s all well and good, yes, but I think it’s also important to put the ‘negative’ buttons right up there with the ‘positive’ buttons, since it should be just as easy for a new user to find the mute/report buttons as it is to find the follow/PM buttons. It’s not like I’m griping as a mod about having to explain one more step to a user trying to figure out how to mute another, but I don’t think that these options should be hidden away. And putting them under the icon of a gear doesn’t seem to be the most sensible idea. Yes, muting and reporting is a function, which I suppose a gear may symbolize, but more often, on the internet, it seems that a gear icon represents ‘settings.’ And while I suppose that muting someone is technically a setting, a better icon could be chosen. I’m just nit-picking, really, but I figure that any suggestion could end up being a valuable one.

On a less nit-picky note, the blue buttons on our own individual profiles are nicer. I think a very good addition is the “blocked accounts” submenu, so that you can easily manage who’s blocked and who’s not, which is something that was hardly as easy to do beforehand. And I understand the monetary incentive for Kongregate to put stuff like “link powerup rewards” and “connect with facebook” and “kreds account” up top, but given that none of this applies to me, I’m glad that it’s at least hidden behind the gear icon. I also don’t mind the general appearance of the buttons.

The About Me Section
This is the change that I hate the most about the profile page. The profile gives us an opportunity to say something about ourselves. It’s our profile. And what matters about us more than our level (which is, in my opinion, way too emphasized) or our badgecount is our self-descriptions. Yet all of our self-description material, from the actual ‘about me’ entry to the location/gender/website, is remarkably de-emphasized in comparison to our statistics, which are remarkably emphasized. If the administration wants to improve the social component of Kongregate, they shouldn’t play down the most important part of an individual’s social profile – who they are. Who I am isn’t explained to you by a big red level number or big grey points count (all that does is tell you that I’ve played a lot of achievement-marked games while I’ve been here); it’s not explained by the number of comments I’ve made or the number of favorite games I have; it’s explained much better by my entry on my ‘about me.’ Hiding the vast majority of the ‘about me’ while allowing the location and website and perhaps a customized gender to be cut off before someone clicks “more about me” is, in my opinion, unfortunate. My profile is supposed to be about me; let me tell you the most important stuff about who I am right up front.

The Statistics:
As I mentioned above, the “level” and “points” statistics are obnoxiously placed. I don’t want to metaphorically scream “LOOK AT MY LEVEL AND POINTS!” to everyone who visits my page. It’s a redundant statistic anyway, given that it’s already noted on my profile next to my name in a much less obnoxious way. Also, above the statistics page is a bar noting how close someone is to reaching the next level. While that might not be irrelevant to everyone, it’s quite irrelevant to me. When I ask for someone’s age, I’m quite happy with “20” – I don’t need “20 and nineteen seven-hundredths.” My cynical side says that the emphasis of the points and level and progress is in part meant to be a psychological incentive to acquire more points and a higher level, thus boosting revenue. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with making changes that boost revenue, I think that the way it was done here is done in a distasteful and ugly way. And even if revenue didn’t come into the equation, it’s still distasteful and ugly.

The other statistics (badge count, comment count, etc.) are done in a more visually appealing way. However, compared to the ‘about me’ user-imputed material, they are still way too overemphasized. On a user-generated profile, I don’t want “me” to be about a bunch of numbers. I want “me” to be about what I have to tell you about me. Yet here, it looks to me like the emphasis is on my numbers; it looks like I and everyone else here is being defined more by their badge count and the number of users following them and being followed by them. And this is very unfortunate.

Connections Box:
Although the word “connections” reminds me a bit too much of networking in the business world as opposed to friendship or friendly personal acquaintance with other people, in one sense, this change isn’t a big deal: the administration allowed a horizontal bar to be slightly shortened, flipped vertically, and fit into a box with tabs. If I do have a somewhat significant qualm, though, it’s with the “+ Follow” button. Speaking generally, it seems silly to enable me to friend someone’s account just because they’re on the friends or fans list of someone else. And because the button stands out so strongly, not only does it look overly repetitive (four big and bold “+ Follow”s, one right under the other, is ugly) but it visually de-emphasizes who the person on the fans/friends list actually is, which is what should matter in the first place.

The “Following” button on our own profiles is even more stupid. If they’re on my friends list, I already know that I’m following them. You don’t need to tell me four times that I’m following the four friends that I see on my friend’s list. If that isn’t enough of a reason to get rid of it, usually, when people on Kong are unfriending people, I don’t think they un-friend the people they most recently friended (or in the new profile’s lingo, followed). If they’re not doing a complete friend’s list overhaul, in which case it would be much more practical if not necessary to go to the full friend’s list anyway, the person they’re unfriending is very likely not to be one of the four most recently friended individuals. It’s also curious that ‘friends’ are de-emphasized and ‘fans’ are hidden on another tab in a profile update that’s supposed to emphasize the social aspects of the individual.

Badges, Favorite Games, and Awards Boxes:
I don’t have any issues with the badges box. The tabs that allow the viewing of different types of badges is a good addition, and badges can still be easily viewed, though less of them can be seen at one time, which I don’t think is a particularly big deal either. A longer list of badges of any sort is only a click away, anyway. You would think if your level and points and number of badges earned was so important, though, that this would be over-emphasized too. I’m pleasantly surprised. I also like the favorite games and award boxes.

What I do have an issue with, though, are the boxes/lists that are no longer included on the personal profile. While I never submitted visual art or music to the collabs, or submitted any levels to any games, many users have, and their complaints about the removal of this information from their profile are completely valid. The visual art and music and level additions in games are creations, and creations are personal. They really ought to be on a user’s personal profile.

Activity Feed:
I remember when the shouts/PMs were modified earlier. At first I was dissatisfied, and then the new layout grew on me. This time, though, I don’t think the activity feed will be growing on me. At the very least, as other users have suggested, the material on the activity feed should be customizable. To give one example: I don’t want to be told that people have begun to follow me when, right next to my activity feed, I have a list of the people who have most recently chosen to follow me. This is redundant and takes away from the more important things in the activity feed. To give another example: I and others don’t need to be informed that I recently won a badge when, right next to me activity feed, I have a list of my most recently earned badges. This is redundant and takes away from the more important things in my activity feed. And while the icons and the little grey speech bubbles may be cute additions, they and some of the other graphic nuances (such as overlaying avatars of communicating individuals) clutter the activity feed in a way that no profile communications box has been.

In conclusion, even though our profile pages don’t belong to us, even though we don’t have the right to control them, they’re personal all the same. And when we feel that something’s personal, we’re not generally fans of people altering those personal things when it’s against our will.

I remember a post by rawismojo, an administrator, which was made back when Kong Plus was created with regard to profile skins: “…We also didn’t want to fall victim to the myspace effect” (proof can be found here: I think that in this case, they shouldn’t allow the profile pages to fall victim to the ‘facebook’ effect or the ‘oh so modern and slick’ effect. Slick, modern looking pages can be done the right way and look great. But these profiles, I feel, are not done the right way. There are some sensible changes, and there are changes that could be more sensible, but as it is now, this new design is a downgrade.

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Topic: Kongregate / Official Kong Plus Thread

An Interesting Development:

There’s a lot of ways to look at the new Kong Plus service that the website’s providing, and a lot of mixed feelings that are borne from it. Those of us who have been around for awhile have seen a lot of changes. Moderators were put on top of chat lists; advertisements began popping up in the game window; Kongregate was bought by another company, and it gave up it’s ‘beta’ tag; kreds were introduced; the front page was redesigned; quests were introduced. The list goes on.

This is another change to the system. Some people see it as another step down the slippery slope toward ruining what Kongregate’s about. Others see it as being a cause of divisiveness. Such similar reactions have been seen before, especially with the introduction of kreds, and they’re perfectly natural – my first emotional reaction was negative, but then I thought about it for awhile.

It’s a Business Decision:
A lot of people see $30 as being an exorbitant price for the services provided by Kongregate Plus. Frankly, if I weren’t granted it gratis, I wouldn’t buy it, especially given that after exploring most of the features, my Kongregate experience doesn’t feel much different at all – certainly not thirty dollars different. Plus, I’d think that lowering the price to a degree to get a greater volume of people signing up for it would result in more profits. However, I’m not the one with the numbers sheets and the revenue records who’s done all the monetary calculations. They probably set the price in a way most profitable for them; and if they didn’t, then I’m sure it’ll change lickety split.

Given that they need to make money in order to keep their business running as it does to the evil corporate overlords from GameStop, I think that this option is a pretty logical one from the perspective of making money so long as the fish bite, per se. They didn’t take away anything from you or me; they didn’t make a decision that seems likely to diminish their userbase in the short or long-term – they simply are providing an extra service to people willing to pay for it. And last time I checked, it wasn’t wrong for a business to provide services in exchange for compensation (unless of course you think that, as HappyYay put it, “exchanging features for money is immoral, and only a company run jointly by Satan and Hitler would have that idea”). On that note, we shouldn’t feel entitled to the services that are given to those who pay. After all, they’re spending money on those things, and we’re not (I know, I know, I shouldn’t be saying “we” since I get K+ benefits, but oh well).

“The Kong you know and love isn’t going to be one bit different. Everything that you can have and use now, you can still have and use.”
I agree with the second part of this statement; I disagree with the first. Nothing has been taken away from the non-paying user. But a new dynamic has been added to the experience, and I don’t think that that can be denied. All of the sudden, you see people that have K+ icons in chat. That might evoke negative feelings, or bring about some sort of prejudice against that person, or no one may give a rat’s tail. When you do the badge of the day as a free user, you only get half as many points as a paying user. You can be invited into a private chat, but you can’t make a private chat yourself. Of course, these people getting these benefits are paying for them, which is why they get them – they aren’t just handed out by Ducklette to the people she thinks are the sexiest. As a result, there’s nothing unfair about it. I repeat, however, that it is a new dynamic with some noticeable components, and we can’t quite predict at this point what it’ll change when it comes to the community.

The Particular Benefits:
The advertisements never particularly bugged me, but I have to say that Kongregate looks about 2.5% nicer without them. The beta-access business doesn’t particularly excite me either, but I’m sure some people are interested in the feature.

If I were given the option to have the K+ next to my name, I wouldn’t put it there. I’d feel like willingly putting it up would seem like I’m rubbing in people’s noses the fact that I get extra benefits, and I wouldn’t want to attract any special attention just because I’m paying for these benefits. For the same reason, I’d want to be able to remove the “Kong Plus” banner from my profile.

The K+ rooms present quite a new dynamic that’s largely unfortunate but at the same time has its upsides. First the bad news: If K+ users begin to use those rooms as regulars, it means that they’re pulling themselves out of regular chat. This will have a negative effect on the health of the room they’re leaving, most likely, because regulars are by definition active, and they’re generally comparatively civil. Plus, non-paying users who are their friends will be hurt by their departure. Even though they can still be contacted with PMs and be invited into private rooms, nothing’s quite the same as simply hanging out in the same room with your friends. There’s a level of separation that’s unpleasant to the non-paying user. On the upside, it makes sense to give paying users a reprieve, should they seek it, from your average 13-year-old flame warrior.

The private chatrooms are pretty nice if you’re looking to get together with your home slices and hang out. I don’t see myself using them too much in the future. When I want to talk with a bunch of people at one time, they’re generally in the same room I am, and if they’re not, I either join them or ask them to stop by. And if someone wants to tell me something privately, they PM me. But the private chat tab, I suppose, refines that system to some extent.

I’m not particularly excited about the skins, if only because the selection at the moment is limited, and I don’t find any of the options more attractive than the default. If they come out with something that’s super-awesome, though, I’m sure my attitude will change. It’s also a good idea to keep the skins under Kongregate control, particularly given the ‘myspace’ effect that Raw cited. After all, customized pictures could really bork the aesthetic of the profile, and I doubt the administration would want that. As long as they can come up with a wide variety of Kong-formatted skins that suit a wide variety of tastes (solid colors might be worth introducing, perhaps?), it should be an alright feature in the long run. Though it will be a bit odd seeing everything with a default Kongregate format and then visiting someone’s profile only to see a whole other background.

Receiving double points for the ‘badge of the day’ is an attractive perk to potential buyers, given that the whole achievements system is one of the addicting things about the website. Non-paying users might be dissatisfied that paying users can level up faster than them because they’re paying cash, but given that Kreds can be used on some games that have achievements, this isn’t a particularly radical new addition. Kongregate’s achievement system hasn’t been fully egalitarian for awhile; now it’s another notch less egalitarian.

The faster customer service business fits well into the scheme too. It is indeed perfectly sensible for a business to give paying customers faster service than non-paying customers. In essence, the customer service of regular users isn’t compromised either.

As for the ability to give Kong Plus to others, assuming the word gets out that this ability exists, Happy summed up what I think might happen: ““can i pls hav a suscrption coed” will become one of the most-asked questions on this site.” If the word doesn’t get out, of course, it won’t be that much of an issue. I’m curious, though, as to how many people we can give free subscriptions to. I can’t imagine that it would be very good on the monetary end of things for Kongregate if the free subscriptions could be given out here, there, and everywhere.

“Re: Mods Yeah, we don’t pay them for all the stuff they do. We do gift them things every now and again….Plus, they’re supposed to be helpful liaisons to the community about all things Kong. If they’re missing something, they can’t be that helpful about that particular thing.
Giving the benefits to mods is more of a gift than a tactical decision, but in part a tactical decision as well. It makes sense to give moderators access to K+ chats. After all, just because users are paying doesn’t mean that they’re saints or never butt heads with others. At the same time, we don’t need to be given something like double-points for Badges of the Day in order to be “helpful liaisons” on that topic. That’s where the gift portion comes in. Plus, if you give the benefit to mods, one might argue, they’re more conscious of it, and therefore more readily able to help, but that’s minutiae.

This is not payment, however. First off, we weren’t given 50 kreds like Kong Plus users who actually sign up on their own accord. And look at it this way: I volunteered at a Museum this summer. The museum offers beverages gratis to everyone who works there, and makes everyone who visits the museum pay for their beverages. Now, everyone who frequents the site as a user has the option to pay for the beverage that is Kong Plus, but us volunteers, us mods, are allowed to drink the beverage for free. I’m not being paid with Kong Plus for being a mod, just like I wasn’t paid with beverages for volunteering my time at the museum.

All in all…
As with others, I have some mixed feelings about Kongregate Plus. I think it’s more of a positive change than a negative change, but it still has a negative side to it. We’ll see how it all works out in the end.

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Topic: Kongregate / Girls and boys on kong...

Flirting Frenzy?

Lets keep in mind that Kongregate is a place that’s generally the most attractive to a teenage population. The nature of many teenagers is to sexually flirt, joke, discuss, or otherwise talk or experiment in an attempt to have a good time of one degree or another. Being female on Kongregate in any overt way means you’re probably going to be hit on, while, to a lesser degree, being male in an overt way is going to attract the attention of one female or another. It needs to also be remembered that ‘flirting’ and other sexual chat occurs in varying degrees ‘round here, anything from a boyfriend and a girlfriend making lovey-dovey statements at one another, to a random user coming into a chat and asking for a date/sex in the most un-alluring way possible, to a whole bunch of boys and girls joking about boobs, to role-play sex, and all the in-betweens. There’s no way we can make the website date free, and I don’t personally think it would be practical to have an over-arching rule that forbids respectable/reasonable public displays of affection or sexual jokes. We moderators already have “overly sexual language” as a default silence reason anyway, and if any user is being sexually harassed, we also have a default “harassing other users” silence reason – meaning that if the moderator in your room is responsible and active, they’re keeping an eye out for that sort of behavior and moderating it in the first place.

“I realized that what i did was wrong and IF you do hit on girl you should stop before a girl stands up for herself.”
“im just saying what i see, and most girls get pissed of because of it.”
Sometimes individuals look to be hit on. Guys go from chatroom to chatroom asking if there’s any sexy girls that want to date, and plenty of girls put attractive pictures of themselves (or someone they pass off as themselves) in their avatar, add something ‘sexy’ to their name, and chat in a very free-spirited way as a way to attract male attention. Part of the culture of the website is sexualized, and while there’s plenty of people who take it too far, plenty of people also don’t. Individuals are expected to regulate their conduct responsibly, and Kongregate as an institution intervenes when these people aren’t doing so. The thing is, the request you make above, in accordance with the demand “Just make Kong a date free site” is impractical because every single situation is, well, situational. Moderators have discretion for a reason, taking care of the harsh harassment/sexuality, and letting it go on when appropriate. Sometimes you might disagree with their opinions/actions in regard to the matter, but it’s eventually the mod’s decision at that point in time – you can always get another mod or file a report with the administration.

“If the girl doesn’t like what you’re saying to her she has free will to mute you, or mute and report if she feels harassed/violated.”
Fawr brought up a very valid point here. Another wonderful way the website allows people to deal with their issues is to self-moderate. A wonderful thing about Kongregate chat is that while it might make chat seem a bit awkward, all you need to do is press a button and the people you don’t want to hear are taken out of your experience to a very high degree. In terms of tolerance and sensitivity towards sexual issues, different girls and guys have different interpretations, which is another reason why we can’t have an overarching ban on public displays of affection, and which is also why muting is so wonderful. We’re all individuals in the end here, and the website provides all the faculties necessary for anyone who wishes to deal with something they interpret as overly sexual.

“Male and Female…should be treated the same.”
It’s a nice thought, but it’s simply not going to happen. While it’s obviously silly to have gigantic walls of segregation between oneself and the opposite gender based on prejudices, it’s simply social nature for a girl to act differently around a guy and a guy to act differently around a girl. We all treat one another differently, and gender is one of the most potent forces causing that differentiation.

“Every time i have tried to help i get kicked down”
Don’t get discouraged. When you introduce an idea in the forums, you’re going to have some people agree with what you’re requesting/suggesting/stating, and others who are against it. Posting in here, you need to be aware that criticism of your idea is going to happen and, as long as its respectable/on-topic, is going to be tolerated. It just so happens that on this issue, the majority of people participating have some disagreement or other with your proposal. Keep an open mind about it, processing the compliments/criticisms, rejecting the bad ones and keeping the good ones in order to nuance your point of view into what would perhaps be a more correct stance on the point. I’m sure some of the things I say in here will be disagreeable to someone who reads it, and I’m sure it will have some elements that will strike some chords. Regardless, responses happen, take them in stride.

I personally don’t find a problem with the current administrative policies toward taking care of sex-based issues – it provides discerning moderators who, most of the time, can sort out an issue if called to the scene, as well as a mute function, as well as a report button. As for the ways guys treat girls on the site (and the way girls treat guys), it’s always going to vary from the chivalrous to the raunchy to the prudish to the flirtatious etc. You can’t change everybody, neither can I, and neither can anyone else. Keep standing up for how you believe girls ought to be treated, and keep standing up to that standard yourself, but make sure that you don’t become overzealous in combating public love/flirting/joking/talking.

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Topic: The Arts / 1984

::Shameless Bump of Doom and Judgment Day::

I’m still looking for any other submissions people might have :D
If you’re interested, please do make somethin’.

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Topic: Kongregate / Kongregate Team @ WhatPulse

14th place looks good on me.

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Topic: Kongregate / Mod VS Mod

::Rare mod mating ritual with Zshadow::

No pictures! >:c

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Topic: The Arts / 1984

The Mission: Cover the bedroom with posters representing what propaganda in 1984 would be.
The Dilemma: Not enough cool ones out on the internet!

Hence, I’m asking you all to exercise your art skills and create unique and original posters of propaganda you’d see in the streets if you lived in an Orwellian nightmare.

Some examples of posters created include:

The following material is background for anyone who has not read the book, and may be interested in gathering some background before creating a poster (And those quotes really are interesting stuff :P).

The story is centered around a completely government controlled dystopia where, as I’m sure you’ve all heard, “Big Brother is watching” thorough ‘telescreens’ put up everywhere, including privately. Trust is destroyed because any thoughtcrime (thinking/believing something the party disapproves of) is reported by even your spouse and kids, not to mentioned monitored by thr thoughpolice. Newspeak is developed which attempts to cut down on certain words to limit thoughts with language restrictions and therefore create conformity. Doublethink becomes a popular practice, being able to hold two opposite ideas true at the same time (e.g. War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery, Ignorance is Strength). The only reality is that of the Party, what the party says is true becomes true through the Ministry of Truth, which fabricates history and records as it sees fit. The Ministry of Love is the torture chamber where those who have committed thoughtcrime go to be ‘saved,’ i.e. made to conform. Extreme patriotism has been created and products such as victory gin and victory coffee are being sold to promote the never-ending war with Oceania (the dystopia) and Eurasia/Eastasia. A few of these quotes from one of the main characters, O’Brien, sum up the position of the party:

Thank you in advance to anyone who puts their time and effort into creating one of these posters. Much appreciated :D

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Topic: Kongregate / Advertisements

Since there seems to be some confusion as to what the user said, I’ll translate it into ObviousSpeak.
I don’t believe the pre-loader ads should be removed. I believe they should add a greater variety of pre-loader ads. There are only two different ones at the moment which appear every time you open a game, and they are not effective because any user who frequents the site gets bored of seeing/hearing them over and over.
You know, other ads, like one for the new and improved CryptoCola from CryptoCo, the Cryptic Company at the Crux of Cool Comestibles.

The advertisements you mentioned are the only ones I usually get at this point in time as well, at the moment at least. And a diversification in that game space does sound like a pleasant idea, at least. I do not currently know Kongregate’s advertisement methods or how they have them done through the game, but to add more would be a good idea. If what Cammy said is true, then it would require administration to contact that company and make the change (how the change would/could be made, I don’t know, I’m not in on the inside scoop). The benefits for Kong, if it doesn’t bring them more cash, would simply to make it a bit less monotonous for users- because earlier this week, I was thinking the same thing about hearing “My past is not a memory.” Then again, it does really drill the product into your head as well as HeadOn does.
As for the ad company, it would probably get them more clicks/sales for a greater variety of products.

Once again, who knows? Maybe it must be set up that way. Maybe it’s the way the outside organization believes they will make the most market impact. In any case, I certainly could go for a greater variety of ads, or at least an ad that doesn’t repeat the same thing to you every time you open up a new game- even though most of us skip over them anyways :P

And since that’s a big jumble of confusing nonsense, I’ll lay it out more clearly.

Effect of Diversification: Kongregate users won’t get tired of hearing/seeing the same thing over and over again.
Reality: Most users just skip over the ads
Realization: The desire for a greater diversity of ads probably just stems from that first sentence of the Metroid ad.
Reality: The Ads are done by an outside company
Possibility: The outside company may share the philosophy of the “HeadOn” ads, where it believes repeating the same thing multiple times drills the product into users heads
Possibility: Lack of advertising diversity may simply be how the company works
Reality: Kongregate would probably have to work with the other company, which may very well not budge in their ways

As a result, it would probably simply be more pleasant if they got rid of the Metroid advertisement. Since most users usually skip through the ads anyway, it won’t make much of a difference, though it still does generate ad revenue, which will be given to Kongregate/Developers/The Ad Company regardless.

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Topic: Kongregate / Boxheads zombies online

If you happen to mean Boxhead 2play rooms by “Boxheads zombies multi” it’s already here:

If you happen to mean that you’d like the creators to make the game of Boxheads multiplayer, then you can read some opinions of it here:

This would most likely be something that you’d want to take up with the creators of Boxheads themselves as opposed to the Kongregate administration- they’d be the ones making the ultimate decisions about the games. Then again, I’d appreciate it if you clarified, because I really don’t know what you’re asking for. :P

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Topic: Kongregate / Kongregate Team @ WhatPulse

Selly? Beating Crypto? In Whatpulse?

The pain… it sears deep within my soul.

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Topic: Kongregate / 50 ways to become a mod

From the Kongrebible:

Zshadow of the Echoing Halls had rested behind the backlit visor with which his eyes are thence laid out upon the vast plains and mountains of the heavily-heavenly-bodied Kongreverse, when upon sudden rapture of the mind it had been brought to him the aspiration of Modship. “O KonGodly Eminence!” lamented Zshadow, “How shalt I ever reach achievement of mine goal?” Upon this question white light filled his skull and a rumbling luminary shook within his skull. “Zee, your path to power shall consist of many hardships. Locate a disco ball within 5 miles of your permanent dwelling and venture forth to its location, if one does not exist, thou shalt venture for 40 days and 40 nights through the concrete jungle until thou dost discover one. Bring your dainty palms upon its surface and you shalt hear my voice again.” And the Eminence was obeyed.

“Zee, your path to power has many hardships more. As my voice fades from your body a can of holy papal spam shall fall from the disco hall. Venture but 500 paces northsouth to a land plagued with Yorkshire terriers, unicorns, robot butlers, and Mario. Plant upon the rear of Mario the can of spam, emptied of its holy contents, filled with one C4, and stand breast to breast as the explosion commences.” And the Eminence was obeyed.

“Zee, your path to power has many hardships more. You are now away from your body, but a holy soul walking the hallowed grounds of the Kongreverse, without visibility of all other holy entities, not visible by any entity at all. Search the crevices of the collabs, the edges of the forums, the cores of the chats, the surfaces of the games, until thou reach the golden hippo. Thou shalt meet resistance, but this matters not. Plant your posterior upon this golden beast- it shalt transform its epidermic layer to one of purple color, and upon its head shall fall a tophat. Wings from its posterior shall emerge and shall lift you into the heavens. Close thine eyes and re-open them, before the holy altar of the Lord your Gerg you shall stand. Await me upon its steps.” And the Eminence was obeyed.

For forty days and thirty nine nights Zshadow, without food nor drink save seventeen bowls of Honey Nut Cheerios laced with milk from the forty heavenly green cows, waited for the voice of the Eminence once more. But the voice hath not come to him. His head he turned to writings on the step below, and for the second time his consciousness realized the Eminence was not only within him, but within the step as well. He was unable to read what was upon the step, however, so he looked upon the heavens and the clouds of the Kongreverse. The cryptic words lay there as well. Soon, everywhere he turned his eyes, the words filled his every thought, his every move, every ounce of his spirit. Upon a raputre of the mind Zshadow understood with sudden comprehension what next was to be done. Step my step he dragged his empty shell of a body to the height of the stairs, and touched with his left ring digit the cheesecake upon which he looked. The Kongreverse swirled around him, its light blued and yellowed and meshed and textured, before he could comprehend he sat before the feet of Lord Gerg himself.

“Child” spoke a left handed cowboy sitting upon the shoulder of Gerg, “all left for you is but a single hardship. Thou must castrate your left manhood and lay it at the foot of the Lord your Gerg.” The cowboy was obeyed. Zshadow, still screaming from agony, was thence lifted into the air by the Lord your Gerg and infused with every object in the Kongreverse named with an M. And so it was, Zshadow returned gently to the seat behind his backlit visor with which he saw all the plains and mountains of the Kongreverse, a hammer in one hand and armor coating upon his chest, embossed with a holy M.


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Topic: Kongregate / Wonky Chat

It was Better Kongregate. I had Grease Monkey disabled already. Just unchecked all of Better Kong and things went back to normal. Woo :D Thanks 123aaa789!!

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Topic: Kongregate / Wonky Chat

I’m currently having the same issue.

If I remember correctly, the two things I typed were:

“Woo, this chat looks tip top notch after that snazzy maintenance”

“Oh no, it’s doing it for me too?”

Also, went into chat again, typing “.__.” came out as “Ll9fLg==”

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Topic: Kongregate / GameStop (maybe?) ruined Kongregate

Badges and Games and Quality, Oh my!

I personally haven’t noticed any sort of radical change in Badge production.

Game Quality: This is strictly an opinion, and though your opinion might have been that the games aren’t good, my opinion is that the recently badged games such as CastleWars 2 (whose predecessor, Castlewars, was also badged long long ago), Harry Quantum, which is one of the many point and click adventures (like the Adventures of Reemus, most/all of which have been badged) to have been given a medium badge, and This is the only level TOO which was badged just like it’s predecessor, This is the only level, and other elephant games like Elephant Rave.

Frequency of Badging: This doesn’t seem to have been altered, either. You may be left with this impression because Greg, the administrator who makes the badges, was on a one week honeymoon a week or two ago, and during that time didn’t produce any badges (though challenges still were produced).

“yea, i COULD go back and get old badges from old games, but i want new games, games i haven’t played before”

You came to Kongregate in 2009. You’re level 21. There’s a huge amount of badges you still haven’t earned, which suggests that there’s many badged games you either haven’t played or haven’t really played in depth. Usually, when Quests come out, I’m faced with having every badge but one from a game I swore I hated and would never play again because I stunk at it- nonetheless, I played it, added some more focus and determination, and earned the badge.

Furthermore, nowhere near all the games on this website have badges. Play some of the great games that haven’t been incorporated into the achievements system, like Mastermind: World Conqueror. There’s plenty of them, just because it doesn’t have a badge doesn’t mean it doesn’t have any entertainment value.

Finally, I don’t see why a corporation which acquired the company would have any motive to ruin anything – it would be pretty silly to trash an investment that’s key in your entrance to online gaming. The quality stayed the same as demonstrated (and many of our good games still come from Armor Games), the frequency hasn’t changed (it always seems slow when you’re eager for new badges to come out, anyway), and there’s thousands of games without badges to check out.

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Topic: Kongregate / Donahu for President

The Kongregate Government

Classification: Fascist Goat Administrative Regime of Communist-Mod Funkilling drawing Pseudo-Marxist principles from Quasi-Anarchist Republics and deriving necessary principles from Oligarchical Theocratic Police States.

Kongregate Flag:

- Demagogic Leader: Jimily K. (Kongbaby) Greer
- Spineless Cohort:* Gerg
- Lenience Panel Members (Adopted in place of Death Panels):* DuckClaire, Alisonette

Law Enforcement: Kongregate has a squad of approx. 595 Psychotic Enforcers trained in various schools of funkilling (Lenience Academy, Forumwich, Collab Citadel, and Strictpoint being the four most popular choices) who loom over the majority of the citizens and exert their will at their discretion. Users may also protect themselves usinga special earmuff/visor set which can make, for that person, any unwelcome unit disappear.

Economic System: Merchants (Marked with D’s) create products which the consumers buy and beat senselessly until badges, round-edged squares (badges) made of 0’s and 1’s, fall out. All merchants are require to list what badges their products contain. These badges, based on their 0-1 composition, have different values- usually the ones with the most concentrated 0-1 composition fall out of the merchants’ products last. Badges are then processed to award the user points. There is no spending in the Kongregate economic system, wealth accumulated is only a symbol of authority/experience.

Immigration Policy: The Kongrenation has an open borders policy for all immigrants. All they must do is give Kongregate basic information about themselves (e.g. name and birthdate) and they are admitted into the borders. Most immigrants are tourists who heard of a certain attraction or product and checked it out before deciding to become a part of the nation. The other major bunch of immigrants were brought here by existing members of the nation.

Crime: Certain districts of Kongregate have much higher crime rates than others. There are many districts which are constantly vandalized with swastika-graffiti, or filled with hateful language (how dare they assume our glorious nation would give into such a thing as “Free Speech”). These districts tend to have scarce law enforcement. Punishment for crime involves being brutally maimed by a Psychotic Enforcer. Criminals have been known, however, to get their hands on cloning machines, recreate their bodies to exact specifications, re-apply for citizenship by means of false identification, and continue to commit crimes.

Demographics and Culture: Kongregate is a diverse nation of citizens who have flocked from world-wide to enjoy the many services the Kongrenation has to offer. They bring different languages, walks of life, and internet cultures to our streets. The most prominent demographic is “Young East Coast American” according to the Kongrecensus bureau. Citizens tend to express themselves and their culture through various showcases of Youtube videos in Kongregate’s fine cinemas, or with their unique internet accents (e.g. “I r t3h 1337 Pwnz0r”). Flaunting femininity is one of the prominent traits of the Kongregate female culture. Different Kongregate subcultures exist in each district of Kongregate.

FUN FACT: Kongregate is the highest producer of Elderberries in the NewArmorGate Region.

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Topic: Kongregate / Top 328 and counting Posters (First: Minnakht)

In terms of the validity of this sort of thing, it is perfectly acceptable, in my eyes, as long as users don't turn it into a competition. Some high-posting users active on the Kongregate forums already made that mistake once, I would hope that they as well as the rest of the ones who witnessed it learned their lesson the first time and don't continue to make the mistake.

As for keeping this thread alive, yes, Selly will have to post occasional updates (I can't see in 10,000 years the administration making this a sticky) but at the same time a few of us will simply to have to chime in with some thread-related stuff. if he wants to make the effort, he can say how much each of a certain top amount of users have posted since the last update, if places were exchanged, etc. As long as there isn't completely off-topic posting and post spam, everything ought to be a-okay. It will be a chore for him to keep updated, though.

Regarding the Zebradood "disagreement", I don't know who the 'others' are that you (Zebra) are comparing yourself to, whether it's regular forumers or regular forumers who have been on Kongregate Forums for a long time like you, but in comparison to other regular forumers who posted on this thread (understanding that people weren't necessarily part of the forum since they first joined)-

(In my data, I include all posters on this thread with more than 1,000 forum posts to consider them top posters, by Selly's criterion).

-Member since July 22, 2008.
-5006 Posts

- Member since October 3, 2007.
- 5411 Posts.
- Hence: User is older by approx. 9 months, and has 405 more posts.
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since May 29, 2008.
- 5449 Posts.
- Hence: User is older by 2 months. Only 443 more posts.
- Conclusion: You have posted about the same amount as him

-Member since November 5, 2009.
- 4147 posts
- Hence: User is 16 months newer. Only 1000 fewer posts.
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since May 24, 2008
- 3069 Posts
- Hence: User is older by two months. 2000 fewer posts.
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since March 20, 2009
- 7386 Posts
- Hence: User is newer and has posted more
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

Member since August 23, 2008
- 10542 Posts
- Hence: User is newer and has posted more
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

- Member since June 27, 2008
- 5741 Posts
- Hence: User is approx. one month older, has 735 more posts.
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him.

- Member since September 8, 2008
- 3394 Posts
- Hence: User is Approx. 1.5 months older, has 1,612 fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since April 19, 2008
- 8,521 Posts
- Hence: User is 3 months older and has 3,515 more posts
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

- Member since December 21, 2007
- 13,350 Posts
- Hence: User is 7 months older and has 8,344 more posts
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

- Member since October 10, 2009
- 4667 Posts
- Hence: User is 16 months newer, has 339 fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

- Member since March 8, 2008
- 1,874 Posts
- Hence: User is older and has fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since August 11, 2008
- 5464 Posts
- Hence: User is almost one month newer and has 458 more posts
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

- Member since December 21, 2007
- 9289 Posts
- Hence: User is older and has more posts
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

- Member since May 26, 2008
- 2504 Posts
- Hence: User is 2 months older, and has 2,504 fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since August 25, 2009
- 1725 Posts
- Hence: User is 13 months newer, and has 3,281 fewer posts. You have 200 posts per month. He has 143 posts per month
- Conclusion: You have posted posted more actively than him

*Vegard20 (The secksy one):*
- Member since February 21, 2008
- 10598 Posts
- Hence: User is 5 months older, and has 5,592 more posts
- Conclusion: You have posted less actively than him

- Member since February 17, 2008
- 2429 Posts
- Hence: User is older and has fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since January 31, 2009
- 1731 Posts
- Hence: User is 5 months younger, and has 3,275 fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since April 5, 2008
- 4101 Posts
- Hence: User is older and has fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since June 1, 2007
- 3,134 Posts
- Hence: User is older and has fewer posts
- Conclusion: You have posted more actively than him

- Member since January 2, 2009
- 3,882 Posts
- Hence: User is 4.5 months younger, and has 1,124 fewer posts. He has 204 posts per month, you have 200
- Conclusion: You and him have posted equally actively

Total top users in thread you posted more actively than: 11
Total top users in thread you posted as actively as: 2
Total top users in thread you posted less actively than: 9

Based on these numbers, you post at about an average level, neither much more nor much less, than the average top user _in this thread_. I know you said post count, but I figured post activity would be more accurate.

Edit: Hate formatting fails ;-;
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Topic: Kongregate / Top 328 and counting Posters (First: Minnakht)

(Darn Ninja)

Saint_Ajora is a user who frequents (exclusively, I think) the serious discussion forums.

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Topic: Kongregate / Top 328 and counting Posters (First: Minnakht)

Don’t vote Crypto for membership in the Oligarchy of top posters!

- He flip flops on his alleged post count all the time. Last time we looked it said 1729, and all of the sudden he’s moving up on the list. Its about time we get someone who stops gradually catering to those higher posters- when will we finally have someone who lowers his post count? When we vote for arcaneCoder.

- He makes incomprehensible textwalls which ramble endlessly about subjects. What we need is someone who makes less lengthy textwalls but still gets the point across. When will this happen? When we vote for arcaneCoder.

- He isn’t a regular user. He isn’t a forum mod. He isn’t a curator. He isn’t an administrator. He isn’t even a developer. In other words, he is nothing. We need someone with substance and authority. When can we get that? When we vote for arcaneCoder.

Vote arcaneCoder for the Oligarchy of Top Posters.

He promises to serve you well.

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Topic: Kongregate / Kongregate Team @ WhatPulse



Oh, how it hurts to not be considered in the top five >:O

(Not that I’m planning on participating anyways :3)

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Topic: Kongregate / "Kongregate 101: Everything you need to know about Kongregate" Blog

S’a nice idea, I’m just afraid that many users have had the same idea, and there’s many blogs based upon different aspects of Kongregate.

Kongregate Collective Guides:

Kongregate Game Guides:

Blog about Kong Badges:

Blog about Kongregate’s Whatpulse team:

Old Kong Blog from ’08:

Blog focused on Kongregate games:

I’m sure there’s plenty more. But if you can come up with something unique and catchy and get a steady Kongregate following, I’m sure you’ll do okay. Check out those sites and any others you can find for inspiration :D

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Topic: Kongregate / Have you heard of the user that posted above you?

Never have I met you, kind and intelligent fedora-fellow.

But I wish to point out that there is one stick figure who pwns yours ;D


Okay, Jaume, be that way.
Yes, I’ve seen Jaume many places. From my shouts to the Kongpulse thread to the general forums to the chatroom. He never fails to intrigue the masses with his above par banter.

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Topic: Kongregate / Greg Month Avatar Contest! (round one)

Originally posted by damijin:


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Topic: Kongregate / August - Greg Month!

I’m in! :D

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Topic: Kongregate / The *thank moderator* button....

Originally posted by Vegard20:

Cryptosporidian said I could write whatever I wanted to, does that mean the mods are the only ones getting it?

I’m not sure whether or not we are the only ones who get it, but it is delivered to us through the all-mighty Kongbot.

What I meant by you can say whatever you want to, is that we get a variety of messages of all kinds via that vehicle. I’ve received novel length descriptions of thankfulness, I’ve received thanks for taking a modcall and helping out, I’ve received funny ones that have nothing to do with thanks at all, and I’ve received, ironically, insults about how I’m the worst moderator there is. I doubt you need to worry about it being a super-formal vehicle, believe me, most if not all mods get a chuckle when the “thanks” is hilarious or has nothing to do with anything, or appreciate it when its a nice thanks.

Originally posted by Vegard20:
Originally posted by Laxaria:

Thank moderators more. They need it. T_T

Why do you need it? :/

Moderation can be a very thankless job at some points. You come in and do your job, get a yay for silencing the troll, and leave. Plus the M draws plenty of hatred, unappreciation, slander, and other crap from unappreciative users, users who don’t like the idea of moderation, etc. I personally am happy with the amount of thanks I usually get, and it is nice to know that there are those who appreciate someone giving up their free time to help out with no real compensation, but at times it really does feel as if no one appreciates your work.

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Topic: Kongregate / Kongregate Team @ WhatPulse

It didn’t say Top Position according to the blog post, which I simply copeh pasta’d ;D

And that’s interesting that that one letter takes you to a website that still doesn’t seem to have anything to do with Kongpulse or blogpot.