Recent posts by ivod on Kongregate

Topic: Kongregate / How did you stumble upon Kongregate?

Greg kidnapped me in the early years of kongregate, and placed me behind a computer where I was forced to play on kongregate.

Topic: Kongregate / New badge discussion

Both games are extremely good and the badges perfectly fit. Thanks Raw! :)

Topic: Kongregate / New Kongregate Version: Forum Search and More Game Info Hovers

I thought ‘Search for games and more’ would be good enough ^^

Topic: Kongregate / Post Your Wins.

Originally posted by MyNameIsNothing:

1111111

You could’ve deleted 25 friends and post 906 replies to make the win even nicer^^

Topic: Kongregate / Absolute worst (and I guess best) Kongregate badges

The only thing I’d REALLY want to see is that all unearnable badges will get prince of persia’d (The player gets the badge points, but the badges vanish)… Although I got most of the unearnable badges it is really demotivating that most of us can’t get all badges because of this. Thank you!

Besides that I totally agree with DarkLink_BR here^

Topic: Kongregate / Post Your Wins.

Originally posted by vesperbot:

That’s my win:

I remember that game! I haven’t played it for a long while, I haven’t gotten that far though.

Topic: Kongregate / New badge discussion

Originally posted by AdeebNafees:

DOWN WITH GREGISMOJO

Topic: Kongregate / How to spot a hacker

Topic: Kongregate / Petition: Bring back 50 comments per page

/signed
Honestly it takes next to no bandwith to load 50 comments per page and 10 comments per page makes everything a hastle.

Topic: Kongregate / Let's not forget people...

Originally posted by AEBEATIAxSOOKIES:

The huge amount of money Kong makes from MMOs is going to Greg’s plan to take over the world.

Topic: Kongregate / Apocalypse Nao! (Winners announced...finally!)

Originally posted by CowFriend:

wtf. I was destined to win. Someone must have hacked into Kong and changed the winner’s list.

Sorry about that

Topic: Kongregate / New badge discussion

Dawn of the dragons: I liked the game up to the medium badge, but this is just insane… Not only does the badge take weeks, if not months to get, it’s also really repetitive and not a ‘goal’ instead. Bah!

Caesar’s Day off: Nice little ‘game’, and a good simple easy badge

Wake up the box 5: Just as good as the other 4 games and good badge

Frantic 3: I’m really glad this game got badges (especially the impossible badge; it’s not really that hard but it’s fun to play). Here are some tips (I commented on the game itself but the comment is probably dead by now):

First of all, get the ‘interceptor’ ship. Play on kamikaze (no hits allowed) and casual (bosses and enemies are weaker and bullets are slower). Completely focus on dodging, money won’t be a big issue. Get 8 cannons and 1 rocket (yea, the ninth weapon slot is in dark green and hidden but if you click on it you can buy a weapon there:p), and 3 power booster, 3 overdrive drive and 2 Absorption panels. The only hard thing about the impossible badge are the last 2 levels (Area 5 bonus 2 and 3), in which I show the tactics here; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5Nv1cLOamI Good luck!

Topic: Kongregate / New badge discussion

If you’re having trouble trying to get the hard badge, 254 warps; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZzhYVWxVhU

Topic: Kongregate / New badge discussion

Since you can quit a level at any time and reset your warps for that level to 0, that would be useful.

Genius! thank you for that

EDIT:
I just ended with 245 warps. This is how many warps I had total after the levels: After level 1: 2, level 2: 12, level 3: 19, level 4: 27, level 5: 42, level 6: 55, level 7: 89, level 8: 99, level 9: 110, level 10: 126, level 11: 168, level 12: 184, level 13: 210, and at the end of the final level 14: 245.

EDIT 2:
I’m currently uploading 2 youtube video’s with a full walkthrough

Topic: Kongregate / this is for people who want to see if people really do win contests on kong

Send me a playstation 3 with your 10k gamestop card and I’ll believe you.

Topic: Kongregate / Badge of the Day 2013 (BotD) Archives - February 24th: Dungeon Defender "Jailbreak"

Originally posted by Fricknmaniac:

I don’t know if this is intentional or a bug, but after having earned the earlier BotD, the new BotD doesn’t trigger. Which seems like kind of a ripoff since I’m leaving at least 25 points on the table (even though I don’t really care about points, I care more about earning every BotD).

same here! I didn’t even notice it

Topic: Kongregate / Best of 2012 Quest!

Originally posted by Terastas:

Originally posted by ivod:

If you can make better games, go ahead. I’ll be the first one to play them and see that your creations will be no better than these.

Yes, that’s right, the fact that I couldn’t make a game of my own means I’m also incapable of recognizing when someone else can’t either. Imagine if George W. Bush had answered all the ridicule that he was an awful president by yelling “I’d like to see you do any better!”

No, I couldn’t make a decent game if I wanted to. But from the look of things, neither can Armor Games, Berzerk, Fazecat, or anyone else that Kongregate is way too quick to trust. The only difference between all of them and me? I have no delusions to the contrary.

No, I take it back. Looking at the list again, I think only half of them could have actually been delusional. The other half are laughing hysterically watching nimrods like ivod 5-star and favorite all this garbage that took them less than a day to slap together. Half the games on the list aren’t even the full games — they’re teasers for games you can buy for your smartphone, fundamentally not all that different from the slew of one-level-only games that comes free with your PS1.

And those games, which are literally nothing more than advertisements for a real product, were named “Best of 2012.” You know what the developers are going to take away from that? They’re going to realize that they don’t even need to try anymore — that they can just take their old 8th grade CompSci projects, update the graphics with crap out of their recycling bins, and STILL get an average Kongregate score of 4.0 or higher.

So don’t give me that “Let’s see you do any better” B.S. If the best you can come up with to defend a game is to say that it’s better than something produced by someone who has zero experience in game developing, I consider that all the proof I need that the game genuinely is a true steaming pile of a game.

Alright, so you’re not just a grumpy old man who rates everything down but you got the ability to think and reason… that’s cute.

I’m not a fan of all games here, but I know that they’re just for simple fun. If I want better games, I just buy them on steam. But these free games are free. Besides, the best of 2012 games are each of OK quality, don’t have bugs, and are user friendly. Don’t want to get the badges/finish the game? Sure, but they can nice to play for a couple of minutes if you’re bored.

Topic: Kongregate / Best of 2012 Quest!

Originally posted by Terastas:

Originally posted by resterman:

Originally posted by Terastas:

Terastas rant

I didn’t have the Musaic Box medium badge and still voted for it.

I can blame them for giving these festering turds badges in the first place. And I blame them again for taking the word of a huge group of people, most of whom probably never even bothered playing the games at all before rating them.

Were I at Kongregate, I would have voted in favor of changing the title from “Best of” to “Highest rated.”

Originally posted by LouWeed:

Well I think this year’s quest is about par for the course…the only difference is the last couple of years there was at least one killer game included…2011 had RPG Shooter, and 2010 had Mardek, EBF and Enchanted Cave….of course, this year also improves on the previous two by not having a total stinker like Doodle God or Tyrant (I say this without yet having played Paladog), so it all balances out.

Originally posted by resterman:

Originally posted by Terastas:

Terastas rant

I didn’t have the Musaic Box medium badge and still voted for it.

I stopped reading when the implication was made that BBR is not “incredibly boring, incredibly ill-conceived, or both”.

BBR is only not boring compared to the other games. The fact that it one of the best games of the lot is not a compliment to BBR so much as an insult to all the other games on the list.

I’d rank them this way from “best” to worst:
1: Knightmare Tower. Just another launch game, not all that different from the original Burrito Bison, though the fact that you attack in the direction opposite the way you’re moving gives a greater emphasis on timing. It gets repetitive very early, but does just enough to keep things at least marginally interesting.
2: Burrito Bison Revenge. It’s the same damn thing as the original Burrito Bison, except with the power-ups swapped around. The only thing that keeps it from being as boring as the other games is the cartoonish nature of the power-ups. I got, at the very least, a few chuckles out of it.
3: Bloons TD 5. Just like BBR, it does next to nothing to hide the fact that it’s basically the same damn game as the others. It has a lot of additional power-ups, sure, but also has an included “cash for content” gimmick.
4: i saw her standing there. The game that had so little thought put into it, the developer couldn’t even be bothered to use the Shift key as he was titling it. The only saving grace of this game is that it’s ridiculously short, so you’ll have the badge before you fall asleep from this snooze-fest.
5: Paladog. It’s an Epic War ripoff, and not even a good one. Instead it uses cute character designs and terrible mini-games to try and compensate for the fact that there isn’t an ounce of originality in the game, which is guaranteed to be either incredibly frustrating or incredibly boring, and never anything in between.
6: New Star Soccer. The ONLY redeeming factor of this game is that, as far as I know, it’s original (or at least isn’t a sequel or a direct ripoff of something else). That, and the medium badge only took a couple of minutes to get, so by the time you’ve figured out just how broken the game mechanics are — how much of an absolute chore this game is to play — you’ll already be done with it. Whoever made this clearly didn’t think it would ever be played anywhere except on a smartphone by people bored out of their skulls waiting at the bus stop — the kind of people who would never notice that the game they’re playing is absolute garbage.
7: Decision 2. To it’s credit, this plays more like an expansion pack than a direct knock-off, but there’s just one problem: It all sucks. ATM machines, hiding places and machine gun nests (which are, mechanics-wise, broken) don’t balance out the slew of new, cheap enemies (like those freakin’ werewolves) and stupid defense missions. I gave the original Decision a 1/5, but Decision 2 is far worse.
8: Infectonator 2. I think it’s telling enough that you don’t even have to finish the game to get the last hard badge. This game is as boring a chore as a game can get. The only thing that kept me from falling asleep was that effing music (which is literally the exact same crap as was in the original).
9: Incursion. It’s a ripoff of Kingdom Rush. Not as boring as Infectonator 2, sure, but it pisses me off even more because A) It’s not a sequel — it’s a genuine ripoff, B) it’s shoddily programmed, and C) there’s actually LESS in this game than the game it’s ripping off. It is, blatant and unapologetic in its complete and utter void of originality.
10: Musaic Box. There are plenty of games out there that manage to be frustrating OR boring, but few that can be frustrating AND boring. This game accomplishes this. The puzzles (which have you puzzling together the melodies of preschool songs) are insultingly easy only when they do not rely on cheapness (like one puzzle where four pieces looked and sounded identical to each other), so the developers evidently sought to compensate by making the players search around the scenery for the puzzles first, using a search tool that is an absolute Nazi about the precision of where you are clicking. This helps it achieve the rare feat of being insultingly easy AND a boring chore to play. This game is an absolute insult, both to the player, and to the art department (which I promise you is the only thing every single person who rated this highly took into consideration).

Seriously, I never gave anything on this list a score above 2/5. I wish I could line up everybody that just gave these games five stars without playing them on the side of the road and hire a cab so I could stick my hand out the passenger side window and bitch slap them all at once.

If you can make better games, go ahead. I’ll be the first one to play them and see that your creations will be no better than these.

Topic: Kongregate / Post Your Wins.

Originally posted by MaistlinRajere:

Originally posted by awein999:

Originally posted by zAlbee:

Originally posted by awein999:

2:24 in Advanced World 10

How is this even… what. O_O I need to see this in video form. D:

Sure, I’ll probably make it Monday. Score was gotten live in labyrinth tinychat.

:)

Anyone who wants to see how this is done, PM me in chat. I’m streaming it. It probably won’t be as quick, but I’ll be showing you the general way to do it.

Daamn… and I thought I was good by beating world 10 (normal) in 60 seconds..

Topic: Kongregate / Badge Suggestions!

Originally posted by Bluji:

Also, huge thanks to hamuka mentioning I suggested the Frantacular badge name when he asked for ideas in the Labyrinth.

My sarcasm detector exploded… what happened?

Topic: Kongregate / [Contest] Aliens vs. Colonial Marines Quest (Colonial Marines Win!)

Yay Marines!

“There is a total of six (6) prizes available with an overall ARV of USD $900.00. The odds of winning any prize depends upon the number of eligible entries received for this drawing.

Drawing Date: On or about January 31,2013."

And now wait for the prizes:p

Topic: Kongregate / BUG, I didn't receive a MEDAL!

You can only choose one medal, sorry mate. It’s a contest between the marines and aliens.

Topic: Kongregate / I thought there would be cake

Originally posted by VforVendetta:

Originally posted by ivod:

So I wasted 3 years of my life just to hear that it’s all a lie?!?

Hardly a waste. 8)

practically reaching level 65 on kong was on my bucket list, which was all for the cake.

Topic: Kongregate / I thought there would be cake

So I wasted 3 years of my life just to hear that it’s all a lie?!?

Topic: Kongregate / I thought there would be cake

I reached level 65, but kongregate still has not sent me cake yet… Is it all a lie?