Recent posts by DrunkenCoffin on Kongregate

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Topic: The Arts / Ice and Fire: The Redclaw and the Earthern Kingdom / Shrine -

Originally posted by Cody_Harrison:
Originally posted by DrunkenCoffin:

Sure…

Since your characters are mostly wolves, it would seem logical to name them “packs”. However, the werewolves you described are more civilized than normal wolves, and certainly more numerous… thus, a perfect title would be “clan” or “alliance”.

Now it’s up to you to decide what clan it would be. It could be either a geografic reference (“of the North”, “of (Area)”) or something with a more revolutionary meaning… such as “Sons of x”, “New Rise”, “New Horizon”…

However, I must say that I misconsidered Earthern Kingdom as too fantasy… right now it sounds good to my ear…

Anyway, you should think of a suitable Alliance or Clan name, and if you think that pack would be more original, go with it! It’s your story, afterall, not mine :D

Edit : “Sons of x” might seem a little bit cliche, but it has been used through history by a lot of revolutionaries… and since as far as your story goes, Earthern is the higher power and Redclaw is trying to combat it(which is a nice break from the usual “Good is small, Bad is huge”). That could be described as a “revolution”, thus making it a somewhat good name. However, a synonim could be used for higher effect.

Thanks! I really like " (“of the North”, “of (Area)”) " Idea, I’ll use that. Thanks so much for the suggestions! I really value them :]

Now when you’re saying the “Of the North” Idea, would something like Frostwolves, wolves of the North or just Wolves of the North?

In my opinion, “Frostwolves, Wolves of the North” is a little bit too long, but I have an idea of how you could use that without deranging anybody.

Every minority in the world has an official name(African American, Hispanic etc) and a slang term(Beaner, etc…). So you could have something like that.

For example, in every royal instances they would present themselves as Wolves of the North, while the peasants could reffer to themselves as Frostwolves(“He’s a really lucky Frostwolf!”).

So, there you have it. A little suggestion on making your story more realistic, no matter how many werewolves are in it.

PS. Sorry to everyone who is offended by the slang terms, but I’m not trying to be racist, I’m giving examples of slang which may be translated into a fantasy story!

 
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Topic: The Arts / Ice and Fire: The Redclaw and the Earthern Kingdom / Shrine -

Sure…

Since your characters are mostly wolves, it would seem logical to name them “packs”. However, the werewolves you described are more civilized than normal wolves, and certainly more numerous… thus, a perfect title would be “clan” or “alliance”.

Now it’s up to you to decide what clan it would be. It could be either a geografic reference (“of the North”, “of (Area)”) or something with a more revolutionary meaning… such as “Sons of x”, “New Rise”, “New Horizon”…

However, I must say that I misconsidered Earthern Kingdom as too fantasy… right now it sounds good to my ear…

Anyway, you should think of a suitable Alliance or Clan name, and if you think that pack would be more original, go with it! It’s your story, afterall, not mine :D

Edit : “Sons of x” might seem a little bit cliche, but it has been used through history by a lot of revolutionaries… and since as far as your story goes, Earthern is the higher power and Redclaw is trying to combat it(which is a nice break from the usual “Good is small, Bad is huge”). That could be described as a “revolution”, thus making it a somewhat good name. However, a synonim could be used for higher effect.

 
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Topic: The Arts / Ice and Fire: The Redclaw and the Earthern Kingdom / Shrine -

Well, judging that this is just a draft, it’s quite good. However, the title is way to cliche for pretty much anyone’s liking, and the names of the races seem too.. fantasy. Don’t get me wrong, I get that it’s a mystical story and all that, but Redclaw, Earthern Kingdom… that’s too much.

You do manage to use a reasonably good vocabular and you can get a few people tangled in your story. Overall, it looks promising…