MysterioMage

Thanks for visiting my profile !

Here are some cool jokes for you :
I – Intelligent Dean

One Night 4 college students were playing till late night and could not study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.
In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in
no condition to appear for the test.
So the Dean said they could have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they would be ready by that time.
On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.
The Test consisted of only 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks.
Q.1. Your Name…….. ……… …….. (2 MARKS)
Q.2. which tyre bursted? (98 MARKS)
a) Front Left
b) Front Right
c) Back Left
d) Back Right…..!! !

II – The Times Have Changed
15 years ago…..
A program was….. a television show
An application was…. for employment
Windows were….. something you hated to clean
A keyboard was…. a piano
Memory was…. something you lost with age
A CD was… a bank account
If you unzipped in public you went to jail
Compress was something you did to garbage
A hard drive was a long trip on the road
Log on was adding wood to a fire
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
Cut you did with scissors
Paste you did with glue
A web was a spider’s home
And a virus was the flu!!!
SURE TIMES HAVE CHANGED!

III – Three Foolish Workers

In the high way, there is a big pit, and many accidents happens in this pit every day three workers discussed to solve the problem. The first suggest to send ambulance car beside the pit to be standby for any accident that send him quickly to hospital !
The second said, no, he may die in the way to hospital, so is better to build hospital beside the pit !
The third, the most clever said is too expensive to build hospital beside the pit, so we have to fill this pit in the highway and dig one beside the hospital in the city.

IV – Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.
Applications such as Pokernight 10.3, DrunkenBoys Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications.
I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but uninstall does not work on this program. Can you help me, please !
Thanks,
Mysterio.

Some Rhymes :

I – Can you sing? Not a thing!
Can you dance? Not a chance!
Can you play? Me, no way!
Can you eat and drink? All day!

II – If I was a dog,
And you were a flower,
I would lift up my leg
And give you a shower.

And finally some pictures :

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