polesapolesa

For the Orbo!
Our Tyrant, who art online, Orbo be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on Earth as it is in cyberspace. Give us this day our daily Weakening, and forgive us of our Strikes, as we forgive those who Strike against us. Lead us not into Impulse Walkers, and Deliver us from Atlas, For thine is the game, the honour and the reputation, For ever and ever, Amen.

A Dozer Tank captain is on the battlefield along with his crew of 3 people : the Driver, the Mechanic and a Telecommunications Specialist.

TS : Damn, contact lost with our last remaining forces, we are completely alone now..

Driver : Holy crap, those 2 Tridents caught up to us, can’t lose them! And now, there is a Fighter Jet and a Fortifier blocking us the way out! Captain? What should we do?

(At that time, the battle-scarred captain gets up from his position on the back of the Dozer Tank with a big, burning cigar on his mouth and walks to the front where his crew currently is.)

Driver : Captain! What do we do now?!

Captain : Shut up! John! (the Mechanic) press that button!

Mechanic : What button?!

Captain : Press that damn R.A.T.T. button!!

Mechanic : Yes sir! (<- wicked smile) Now, Driver! drive straight on to this Fortifier and Fighter Jet and stop the tank directly in front of them!

Driver : Ok captain… (few seconds later Dozer Tank stops directly in front of the Fortifier and the Fighter Jet).

Captain : Now watch this!

(The following dialogue is packed up for the sake of space)

Mechanic : Fortifier opened fire on us!
Captain : Regenerate.
Mechanic : ??? Fortifier flurried itself for another round of…
Captain : Regenerate!
Mechanic : Trident strikes us from the rear!
Captain : Regenerate!!
Mechanic : Fighter Jet threw it’s missil…
Captain : Regenerate!!!
Mechanic : Sir we can’t do..
Captain : Regenerate!!!!
Driver : Captain, I…
Captain : Regenerate!!!!!
Driver : But, sir…
Captain : Regenerate!!!!!!
TS : Incoming trans…
Captain : Regenerate! Regenerate! Regenerate! Regenerate! REGENERATE! oh… sorry what’s that Mike? (Telecommunications Specialist)
TS : It’s from the Imperial Commander sir.
Captain : What do they say?
TS : They say “Go %$#! yourselves you stupid $#$#!” sir!

(This is dedicated to all players that get really annoyed with a Regenerate-frenzy Dozer Tank, like myself).

(end of log)
Found on tyrant forum, not my own work, spread round =D