So, for the pirate. Capture the empty bases and upgrade a bit (no time to max at all). Then start sending all your guys to the same base (your own base). I choose the one on the bottom left corner since the travel path from the other bases is shorter. Once you have ~300 units send them all to the big pirate cloud and keep sending. Will probably work if you're fast enough. If labs are researching green ray, you have a bit more time before the final push. Once you have captured the big cloud it's a breeze.
Sorry, I've been a referee for years and had never heard before of that witchery you call "corner kick". Awsum game.
BTW, pretty sure you can't do the fireball shot, a button is missing.
I understand anyone who bashes this, because they were hoping to play "a game". But it's really beautiful and a cool and original way to tell a story without text. 5/5