kitchen_wolf's Comments

I like the nice old man happily pecking away at his grid puzzle before he unleashes cold wet genocide on the Unbelievers.

It just plain doesn't work right. The masters are an unexplained mess (I need to use poisoned arrows to unlock poisoned arrows?). The guard training missions consist of essentially watching the computer play with itself. Rather a disappointment overall.

Through the magic of computer simulation, I can now live my dream of working in a fast food franchise.

Just a tweak, but items in the shops should say what they are (flair, bow, sword, etc.), as it isn't always inherently obvious.

Employment issues aside, WHAT IN HEAVEN'S NAME is leaving the giant piles of poo on the street that require a front end loader for a pooper scooper? And where can I get one?

Needs to do a 180 with "S". The radar should also rotate relative to you, particularly since there is no distinction between walls.

Auto attack? More like auto stand-there-figuring-out-which-end-of-the-arrow-goes-downrange-while-they-run-up-and-smack-me. Lather-rinse-repeat if I decide to get out of the way. Worst shoot and scoot interface I've ever seen. Mindlessly repetitive with a dull and frustrating control scheme. Screw the badge.

The key to the game is the point multipliers. Use your first few shots on the toys like the doll house and the unicorn that only hit the toy for point multiples - then hit big piles of bricks for beaucoup points.

You start off useless and kind of stay that way. No thank you.

Unresponsive controls. Nerfed weapons. Puny play area. I think the "Badge of the Day" is going to backfire, just like DeBlob.

This reminds me of the absurd animations that they used to have on Monty Python.

Real Men (TM) don't need no stinkin' upgrades!

No. Just no.

A boring circle the herd game without so much as a hint at terrain. It's pretty, but so what? Anyone here remember gameplay?

Since I hold the top trebuchet score, I can say this without it being a whine - the release should be reexamined. I'd prefer a cup-type launcher so the sling doesn't add its ration of chaos. I'd also prefer something like a slide bar on the left of the launcher for power (or a pull-back and let go) instead of a timing-based release, particularly since the angle of release is not easily visible from *behind* the trebuchet.

The snap is too coarse.

The idea is wonderful. The graphics and scoring are pretty darn good. The camera is wonky - sometimes it doesn't keep up with a turn and then locks on again at an odd angle. I'd kind of like a free camera option to look around the room and to not stare at the arm of the couch when a shot goes that way. Ball release also tends to go off at odd lateral angles (odd vertical ones too, but that's probably a combo of system lag and user error).

Tivo SMASH!!!

Graphics are nice. Unfortunately, everything else is just plain awful. The control scheme seems lifted from an overhead game from years in the past. The camera should at least follow where your eyeballs are pointed. Arrow keys don't cut it, especially when the flying guys that want you to eat your veggies can come in at other than right angles. Try making the side arrows rotate instead of cardinal directions, and add ADSW for those of us that don't enjoy carpal tunnel syndrome. There's no real tutorial explaining what the hell's going on, just a list of (oddly mapped) controls. I'm sorry, I want to like it, but I just can't.

Why is the walking television so angry?