I wish I could give this game a 0/5. After pointing out all the basic features this game was missing, I still gave it a second chance anyway and discovered it's actually much worse. The game also suffers from retarded A.I. that will deliberately let enemies through while targeting someone further up the line. This is an absolute insulting effort. Screw the badges -- this festering turd should have never been allowed on Kongregate in the first place.
Stupid P.O.S. game reached a game-breaking point of no return only ten minutes into it. Next time, play the game for yourself before you declare "cut and print" jackass.
Hey, do you think this game needs a menu button?" "Nope. Too expensive." "Hey, do you think this game needs a fast forward button?" "Nope. Too expensive." "Hey, do you think this game needs an undo button?" "Nope. Too expensive.
You know what I hate more than anything else in puzzle games? "Puzzles" that depend more on luck than problem-solving. Like that freakin' "Dive" level. The only way to make that freakin' level work is to get incredibly lucky with the way the gel reacts. That's it. It doesn't matter how much skill you have or how much thought you put into it. If the gel decides it doesn't want to behave, your game is over.
And that's why this is an utter failure of a puzzle platformer. You got "challenging" confused with "frustrating."
That you actually think it is within your right to even call this festering turd a game AT ALL is deplorable. Screw you and screw Kongregate for even deigning to pretend that there is any value to this crap PERIOD!
Hey dipshit. Not everybody has the exact same computer layout that you do. On mine, this one is completely unplayable. 1/5 for being a short-sighted over-presumptive douche.
Controls were a little wonky, but I guess that's to be expected when playing as a character with no hands or feet, and I get the impression the level designs took these controls into consideration (a lot of others have controlled similarly but have level layouts like they think they're Ninja Gaiden). Beyond that, however, this was a good model for what puzzle platformers should be like. 4/5.
Only took me five minutes with this game to figure out that you did ZERO beta testing with it. I lost eight lives in twenty seconds because your invincibility buffer is bloody useless. Put this game on a CD so it can be shoved up your ass.
Look, when you classify your game as "adventure" and "horror" and I end up quitting because of boredom from going back and forth saying 'The hell do I go next?' one too many times, you've seriously missed the mark.
I'm guessing the guy who set up the game engine was alienated from the rest of the team completely, because it's now become apparent that some of the races are tragically flawed too. You have eighty cars racing on courses that look like they were designed with a maximum of twenty in mind. This game literally feels like one guy, the engine coder, did all the work, while everybody else just sat around smoking pot and threw the rest together at the eleventh hour. What a waste.
The game engine is pretty decent, and the addition of drafting prevents it from being just another generic racer. The minigames that you chose to flood this game with, on the other hand, are utter garbage, and tend to be either mind-numbingly stupid or impossible on account of boneheaded planning. Slalom is the absolute worst. I'm assuming the handling eventually gets to be unbelievably sluggish due to the tires wearing out, which, in this minigame, will start to occur ten seconds in. It's pretty clear somebody either didn't try Slalom for himself before committing it to the game, or knew it was a flawed concept but didn't care because he's such a shmuck. Either way, this game sucks. Racing games should be about racing, not running over or around crap by yourself.
First DvM kept it simple, and that's what made it fun. This one is WAY too convoluted. Power-ups are added, so now you're switching back and forth between the keyboard and the mouse (or in my case, the touchpad), which is going to be a hassle for anyone who doesn't have the same PC setup as the developer. This oversight, which the previous DvM didn't suffer from, literally cripples everything else about the game. But it gets worse: Enemies now appear to spawn in set locations instead of randomly, and who gives a f*** if that's where you happen to be at the time (IE, cheap shots abound). The music is annoying, and the game is even more anal about your mouse tracing out of the playing field than the first, which will happen often since darting across the playing field is frequently the only way to evade. The original Death vs. Monstars is one of my absolute favorite games on Kongregate. But this? This is garbage. What the hell have you been doing for the last four years?
This is SOOOOOOOOOO not Death vs. Monstars. Or at the very least, it's clearly not by the same people who made the original DvM such a blast to play. Are you sure this game wasn't meant as an April Fools release, because that's honestly what this feels like: A really bad joke.
This game was made by an angry little puke whose daddy never hugged him. I'm convinced -- there are too many things too wrong with this game for me to believe that it could be chalked up to simple stupidity. This game is so flawed in so many ways it could only be deliberately so.
This game earned its 1/5 when you introduced the homing missiles. Did you honestly not realize how unbelievably cheap those are in a hyper-shooter? I doubt it.
You've done the impossible. You've taken one of the most basic concepts of gaming and made it a completely miserable experience. Put this game on a CD so we can shove it up your arse.
Puzzles weren't all that interesting or challenging, controls were sluggish, "story" was too predictable to be meaningful, and it was short. It's playable, but not enjoyable. "Meh," in other words. 2/5
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