"But if I start from the beginning, I could probably make it happen." Umm. . . No. Screw you Armor Games. I gave this thing more benefits of a doubt than you deserved, but from start to finish, it was all crap. I wish I could give you a 0/5.
The walkthrough says "click to fire the gate gun." So I go back in and click, and guess what? Nothing happens. Even your farking walkthrough is useless! STOP MAKING THESE SHYTE-LOAD-OF-ARSE TITOL GAMES!!!
Hey ArmorGames. I have a question. Do you beta-play ANYTHING you make anymore? This game has two sets of controls, but it doesn't matter; they BOTH suck. Way to go once again ya' chumps!
Between the "tall screen" format that resists zooming out to get the whole thing into frame and the half-second of reaction time per move you are given, I'm hard-pressed to think of a game more ill-conceived. Was this game DESIGNED to infuriate anyone who attempts to play it?
I think you forgot to, you know, FINISH the beta testing. Because when you beat the last boss, it just stays there until you reset. What the hell ArmorGames? Do you WANT us to think you couldn't give a crap less?
Piece. Of. Crap. There's no other word to describe a game where even the slightest of errors can result in your entire web collapsing from top to bottom and you being forced to watch your avatar quickly run out of webbing and then starve to death. It is so ill-conceived I'm not convinced this is anything more than a junior high comp-sci project. Kongregate should be damn ashamed of themselves for considering this worthy of badges.
It's not a bad game, but there are some oversights that, for such a simplistic game, aren't entirely forgivable. The worst is the lack of auto-fire. There's no penalty to holding the fire button; your gun won't jam or overheat, and power-ups are timed instead of expended, so it doesn't make sense not to have the option. For players using laptops with touchpads like me, the lack of the option involves some awkward and sometimes painful bending. For that, I can't give it anything more than a 2/5.
This started off looking like a fairly decent game, but as usual ArmorGames, you have far too much confidence in yourself. The simplistic yet jerky controls were fine in the earlier levels, but not nearly good enough for some of the absolutely precision-centric levels you threw into the later stages. Getting three stars on some of those latter stages with the controls you gave us is like trying to walk a tightrope in clown shoes. Consider yourself lucky to be getting a 2/5 on this thing anyway.
"Hmm. . . You know, I don't think this game is irritating enough. I've already got a boring concept, a ridiculously obstructive foreground and a "Hint" button that is completely worthless. But it still isn't irritating enough. Hmm. . . Ooh! I know! I'll make a level where the items you have to search for are moving around! Brilliant! Bloody brilliant!" I wish I could give this festering turd a 0/5.
The worst insult of this game was winning the arcade machine at the end so I could "play all [my] favorite training games" at the volcano. I HAD NO FAVORITE TRAINING GAMES!!! Some of them are boring, some of them are frustrating, and a few of them were even glitchy and unplayable, but one way or another, they were all terrible. Put this game on a CD so you can shove it up your ass.
Moron who made this apparently thought he could get by solely on being cute. Unfortunately, the actual races have no gameplay whatsoever, and the training games variate between being tedious and boring to frustrating and broken. This game is a model on what NOT to do in game developing. Shame on you NotDoppler for stamping your name on this crap.
It's passable until you unlock hard mode. It's mislabeled -- it should be "total f--king bulls--t" mode. That's pretty hard to overlook, but it varied between enjoyable to just passable up until that point, so I'll give it a 3/5 regardless.
The only saving grace of this game is that it's short. Otherwise, it's a perfect example of why, just because a certain type of gaming hasn't been made, that doesn't mean it should be made.
Whatever piece of crap thinly disguised as a human being made this evidently didn't think any of us would ever reach the point where a solid horizontal line of birds flies at us, therefore making it IMPOSSIBLE to complete this game without taking a hit. 1/5 for fake difficulty you miserable turd.
Took me about a half-hour to complete, but I'm okay with that. I'd much rather have a game that's easy to play and easy to beat than a game that's difficult to play for all of the wrong reasons. Only complaint I could even think to give was that it was kind of repetitive, but considering the length, that's hardly a grievance. 4/5.
The pattern I've noticed with Nerdook is that they don't seem to care if the game is good or bad just as long as it is different. As such, Nerdook titles are hit or miss. And while they have released some truly awful games, there's never been one that was so bad it honestly made me wonder if the game was DELIBERATELY bad, like it was made by someone that was was mad at the world, drank too much one night and released a game just to piss off everyone who attempts to play it. . . Until now. Nerdook, this is that game. This is the game that is so awful, broken and overall unplayable, that you have no prayer of convincing me that it was ever intended to be anything but.
What turns a man gay faster than taking his special someone to one of the happiest places on earth to propose only to be turned down because his ring isn't fancy enough? How about going out to get her the ring anyway and seeing the bitch flying beside you lobbing hand grenades? :p
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 "Axon"){kind=icon}
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 "Cell Warfare"){kind=icon}
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 "Bullet Audyssey"){kind=icon}
 "Memohuntress"){kind=icon}
 "DuckLife 4"){kind=icon}
 "Mission in Space : the lost colony"){kind=icon}
 "The Love Letter"){kind=icon}
 "300 miles to Pigsland"){kind=icon}
 "Demonrift TD"){kind=icon}
 "Neon Race 2"){kind=icon}
 "Super Samurai Sweeper"){kind=icon}
 "Mardi Gras Mayhem"){kind=icon}
Thank you! Thank you!